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When we were together it was constant comments about how I was barely staying afloat and "how could I take care of her if I could barely take care of myself?". I was trying everything I could to make her happy but she would not let it go. It ended up being part of the reason we split. That was almost a year ago. I now work for a great company and make really good money. I just bought my car last month. I see her coming out of the store and all those talks came shooting back into my head. I just wanted her to see me happy and doing well....ok I wanted her to feel dumb and regret splitting up. Nevertheless I blared the music and slowly rolled right into a car backing out. Luckily it barely scratched it. I saw no regret in her eyes, laughter yes, regret no. So yes I deserved it. Karma sucks.

Of course out of all the FMLs I've submitted through the years - this is the one that went through. Anyway, I'm better now! On top of that, I got hit with the flu like a truck. No laxatives, stool softeners, magnesium, enemas, etc helped and between that circle of hell I ended up going to the ER. Ended up literally tearing myself a new one with an anal fissure. I've never been constipated before so this was awful. Oh also my first day back, our entire building was shut down and we all were laid off. Happy Holidays everyone!

Yay! My first ever published fml! What did I do? I showed him how to hold the paper and told him he needs to wipe with new paper until it stays clean. And that if he does not, he will run around smelly and eventually risk getting an infection. The whole time he looked me straight in the eyes and listened intently, but the only thing that really stuck was apparently the part where I said that a really bad infection can cause him to lose parts of his popo in the worst case. So ya, FML

Hello guys (and probably also girls!), this is OP. I just wanted to explain as to why it was really awkward at the time. I never had any troubles with the escort itself. I became so used to it during our relationship that I even started guiding my mom and friends out of habit. However, she dumped me completely out of the blue. She had doubts about our relationship for more than a month at the time, talked about this with her parents/sisters/friends/etc. Basically, she discussed this with almost everybody around her, except with the one concerning the doubts: me. I personally never felt any doubts, we didn't fight much (just what every healthy couple does now and then :-) ) and my feelings for her never changed. I had even taken her on a 4 day trip to Barcelona (on my expenses) not 2 weeks earlier as a birthdaygift. So when she dumped me while in that park, it felt really unfair, it came as a great shock for me and I also felt some anger towards her which is why guiding her back home was really awkward and something which I didn't really want to do at the time. On the other hand, we didn't fight over it or anything, so it was also obvious for me to stay a true gentleman of course! I had a good talk with her a couple of weeks later and I didn't have strange or sad feelings when I saw her then. Today, it is almost 3 months since the end of our relationship and I feel I am over her. I still talk to her from time to time and we are still nice to eachother (though friends is a big word!).