Kids, Weird Parents More issues than Vogue

More issues than Vogue

Anonymous - 04/07/2020 20:00

Today, my wife is grumpy because our son has his first girlfriend and she feels like she’s been replaced. Our son is 32 and surely it’s about damn time. FML

1 890

167

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Jaded

Anonymous - 26/05/2025 23:00

Today, after my son got his first girlfriend at 19, a nice girl as well, he broke up with her after 3 days because women are "too much effort", too "expensive", and keep trying to make him "do things." Unbelievable. Three days with a woman turned him into a cynical 65 year-old who's been married for 40 years. FML

393

178

Self report

Criminy - 04/01/2024 03:00 - United States

Today, I went on yet another date with this beautiful young lady from my job. I can’t help but feel bad because ever since my wife gave birth to our kid she’s been sluggish and puffy, and I’m not attracted to her anymore, but I don’t know how to leave her because my son would be without a father. I hate this. FML

103

2 570

Armchair psychologist

Mom - 27/11/2023 07:30

Today, I spent yet another lunch venting to my best friend about how much I hate my teenage son's girlfriend, thinking he should be with someone less outspoken. Apparently she got tired of listening because she eventually snapped, "Oh for god's sake, just admit you want to fuck your son already!" and left. FML

1 252

Sitcom dad

Anonymous - 23/07/2022 06:00

Today, my wife is convinced I don't love my daughter. Why? She got her first boyfriend recently, and I was friendly with the lad, instead of doing the stupid "overprotective dad" routine. Apparently, not feeling the need to act like a dumbass sitcom character means I secretly resent my family. FML

1 546

128

Manchild

IFailedasaparent - 24/01/2022 22:59

Today, my son broke up with his fourth girlfriend in a row, because, “all of them get those period things and it’s annoying as fuck.” He’s 20. FML

1 193

588

Succession

Greatgrandpa - - Curacao

Today, my only child introduced his new girlfriend to me. He is 36 and has no children. She is 46 and has a pregnant daughter who she is very close with. I don't know if I'll ever be a grandfather, but in any case, my son is going to be one before me. FML

33 419

2 976

Do not pass Go

Anonymous - 16/08/2023 08:00

Today, I've hated being a parent ever since I was baby-trapped at 17, but I stuck through it and never let my son suspect how I really felt, and we have a great relationship now he’s an adult. Well he just moved out yesterday, and today my wife told me she’s pregnant. Here we fucking go again. FML

388

1 336

Are you doing OK?

Anonymous - 10/01/2026 20:00

Today, my son is only two but I'm already plagued by the idea of him one day having a wife or girlfriend. I'm being kept awake at night by the betrayal of something that hasn't even happened. FML

828

Souvenir

nick - 26/12/2021 08:01 - United States - Federal Way

Today, I found out my son’s middle name was named after my wife’s muscled up highschool ex-boyfriend who cheated on her and who she sometimes still brings up. She tells me it’s nothing and still acts like I’m crazy for communicating my worry to her. FML

1 256

157

The manosphere strikes again

Anonymous - 27/07/2025 18:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my teen son came home in a terrible mood because his girlfriend won’t listen to him. I thought he meant conversation-wise, but he meant she refused to obey his commands about what clothes and makeup she wears, who she can talk to, where she can go, and so forth. My son is an asshole. FML

463

245

DarkAngelsBlade 25

Saturday 4 July 2020 20:07

Well now we know why it took him so long.

Kurliez408 32

Saturday 4 July 2020 20:25

overly attached mother

DarkAngelsBlade 25

Saturday 4 July 2020 20:07

Well now we know why it took him so long.

Kurliez408 32

Saturday 4 July 2020 20:25

overly attached mother

Charlie Given 26

Sunday 5 July 2020 0:44

This FML should be for your son, about his over bearing mom and his issues from it, and don't be surprised if she tries to sabotage his new relationship

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 5 July 2020 1:07

She was probably waiting for Oedipus to make his move.

BurnInDemonFire 35

Sunday 5 July 2020 3:14

This story line pops up every so often in American Dad! that it's no longer surprising. Although the breastfeeding dependency went a little too far for me.