Kids Parents Got 'em - FML

Got 'em

Anonymous - 20/01/2010 06:50 - United States

Today, my older brother and I were teasing our mom about her age. When we jokingly told her it was hard for us to watch our parents get old, she responded by saying, "Yeah, well, it's hard for me to watch my kids grow up and not have anyone who wants to marry them." FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Under pressure

No Pressure - 06/07/2022 04:00

Today, my mom asked me out of the blue if I was ever going to consider getting married. It wasn't until after the conversation ended that I remembered my siblings are all either single like I am, or incapable of having children. I am my mother's last hope of becoming a grandma, and she reminds me all the time. FML

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Anonymous - 26/03/2016 15:36 - United States - Mckinney

Today, my 5-year-old daughter said "Mommy, why doesn't anyone wanna marry you?" I've been asking myself the same question for all too many years. FML

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Stupendous_ - 03/12/2012 07:17 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML

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loser - 02/03/2016 00:20 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, my mum asked when she's getting grandkids. I had to tell her that, at 21 years-old, I hadn't even managed to get a boyfriend yet. FML

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Vessels

failed brood mare - 17/11/2013 17:46 - United States - Hollywood

Today, my mom bitched me out for still being single at age 19, and still not having started a family. She considers this "immoral," yet showed nothing but praise for my sister, who's pregnant at 15 and doesn't know which of three guys is the father. FML

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The matchmaker

Anonymous - 29/09/2022 07:30

Today, my mom has been aggressively trying to get me to marry one of her coworkers, who is around my age. Apparently she loves her like the daughter she always wanted, and since it would be silly to adopt her; she is determined she will be her daughter-in-law instead, whether I like it or not. FML

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Anonymous - 21/06/2009 08:50 - Australia

Today, I was talking with my mother and expressed my slight disappointment at how many of my friends are getting into relationships, whereas I'm still single. My mother decided to encourage me by saying "Don't worry, sweetie. There are boys out there who don't go for looks. You'll be fine". FML

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Surprise!

Anonymous - 12/04/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my 58 year-old mother told me she’s having a baby. Apparently she hasn’t started menopause yet, but assumed from her age she wouldn’t get pregnant when she started seeing a man she goes to bingo with. 58 years-old. My little brother/sister is going to be 36 years younger than me. FML

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Don't mess with Texas

Anonymous - 08/03/2022 11:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my fiancé expressed concern for her mother's health and a desire to be with her in Texas. I called her mother, who is 69 years young and will outlive us all, and it came up that her brother's BFF, who my fiancé has been crushing on since she was a tween, just got divorced and moved back to Texas. FML

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Supportive

bopbop - 20/05/2009 01:21 - United States

Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because she "wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML

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YoungE 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 16:14

lol what happened can joke but not take it?

SliceNthrice 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 16:05

snapppp

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:48

Mom Win! Move out before you are elected President of The Losers Club.

carrotpuke 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 17:59

...probably also jokingly. grow a pair.

heartlessagony 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 18:48

Your mom is cool OP.

sparxva 12

Wednesday 20 January 2010 19:03

Looks like you brought a knife to a gunfight. pwned!

thaprodigy_07 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 19:06

dannnnng that's messed up LMBO

Erock5718 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 19:17

you want some ice for that burn?

TheRipper_fml 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 19:27

Haha your mom got in that ass!

xxxviii 5

Wednesday 20 January 2010 19:28

LOL ,,,mom 1 kids 0..hahahaha go mom!

israelnotjacob 20

Wednesday 20 January 2010 19:31

BURN! Your mom is awesome. She completely whooped you at your own game, lol.

graciedacie 0

Wednesday 20 January 2010 19:36

Classic. Haha, this reminds me of when I first started reading FMLs...definitely added this one to my favorites! :)

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Jealousy Underwear Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I had to make a Twitter account, because that is apparently the best way to get news from our new president. FML

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Today, I was staying at my boyfriend’s place for the first time. In the morning, I brushed my teeth using the toothbrush in the cup next to the sink. He came in and said, “Oh, you found the one I use to clean my sneakers.” FML

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Today, I congratulated a bride standing in front of a church in a white dress. Turns out she'd been stood up at the altar. She thrashed me with her bouquet. FML

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Today, I was looking forward to languishing on the beach for a few days of a “much needed vacation” when I literally got called back into work on my way to the beach. FML

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Today, I witnessed someone giving medical advice that they got from ChatGPT. FML

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Today, after patiently waiting to see my boyfriend for a month because he was overseas, I excitedly went to the airport to finally pick him up, only for him to walk straight past me to greet his friends. He didn't even bring back anything for me, but brought back a suitcase full of goodies for his friends. FML

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