Wanker Intimacy Caught in 4K - FML

Caught in 4K

Evil_Egbert - 12/02/2009 11:54 - Netherlands

Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

JoeyDizz - 06/05/2009 03:41 - United States

Today, while masturbating at the computer, I was interrupted by a flash of light out of the corner of my eye. As I turned to face it, I realized I forgot to close the blinds. Standing at the window in the appartment across the street were two girls, one had a camera and was snapping a second shot. FML

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Anonymous - 24/02/2012 19:18 - United States

Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML

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On a loop

Anonymous - 28/10/2023 05:00 - United States - St Louis

Today, I got home after a long day and decided to unwind a bit. I put some porn on the TV but promptly fell asleep. I woke up three hours later to the same video playing, but realized a had left my blinds open. I broadcasted three hours of Athena Faris having sex to my whole street. FML

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Caught

losingstreak - 31/01/2009 20:47 - United States

Today, I was looking at porn on my laptop when my mom came into my room to talk to me. After she finished what she was saying, she paused and said, "You know, I can see the reflection of your computer screen in your glasses." FML

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MyHeadHurts - 20/01/2012 10:42 - Ireland

Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML

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Not funny

Spawn_of_Satan - 27/03/2009 15:18 - Hong Kong

Today, whilst my parents and I were out, my older brother thought it would be funny to play porn on my computer. At full volume. With my window wide open. Now my next-door neighbors tell their kids I'm a spawn of Satan, and the weird guy from across the street winks at me. FML

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Caught in 404pp

danggit3290 - 03/05/2009 17:17 - United States

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "You know, I'm looking RIGHT at you." FML

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Broadcasting

Anonymous - 16/01/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, at 1 a.m., I had my headphones on trying to watch porn. I live in an apartment with thin ass walls anyway, and I didn’t realize my headphone jack had come undone. The volume was terrible on the video so I raised it louder, not realizing it until like maybe halfway through the video, and my window was also open. FML

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Caught in the act

MeAgainDr - 08/08/2023 04:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was taking advantage of an empty house to try and re-spark my sex drive. Despite my best efforts, I got bored and started watching something else, but when my housemate returned suddenly, I panicked - gave a guilty shout and fumbled my dick away as I changed the monitor over - back to porn. FML

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Anonymous - 24/11/2015 13:17 - United States - Westborough

Today, I was jerking off quietly so my roommates wouldn't hear me. In the middle of it, one of them sent me a screenshot of an error message on a porn site, asking if I was having the same problem. I guess I wasn't being so quiet after all. FML

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mcdiaz 0

Friday 20 February 2009 23:30

Kind of like an X-rated batsignal

redhead10 0

Thursday 5 March 2009 20:49

#27 i'm sorry but watching **** in the privacy of your own home does not make you a pervert. get over yourself.

Bubbelz 25

Tuesday 9 March 2010 15:03

hahaha xD slimmerik! YDI voor je vooruitdenken

sarahdarlin_x 0

Wednesday 31 March 2010 4:10

LMAOOO. i almost died laughing there. nice one ;)

NiceGuy2 0

Tuesday 6 April 2010 0:41

hahaha lmfao when I read this I couldn't stop laughing hahaaaahaha idiot

eener_21 0

Monday 19 April 2010 17:36

hehe

elmy_fml 0

Monday 19 April 2010 21:52

Whahahahahahahahaha, ik vraag me echt af hoe je daar achter bent gekomen!!! xD

daffyduckdd 2

Tuesday 4 May 2010 13:48

rofl

kaycay0211 0

Friday 21 May 2010 2:44

haha oh shoot, that's funny sorry tho.

yaaan3825 0

Friday 18 June 2010 23:24

Lmao.

Rutgerman95 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 19:19

WAT?!? Okee, ik heb een tip voor je: Haat je leven!

tohaveandtohold 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:06

dude how the he'll I'd u find this out??

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I drunkenly made out with my 65 year-old married female boss. I'm a 21 year-old male intern. I have a feeling work will be awkward tomorrow. FML

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Today, I was set up on a date by a coworker. The guy turned up late, but whatever. He then spent 30 breathlessly long minutes complaining about his "bitch of an ex." Then he spent another 30 minutes trying to convince me that the QAnon bullshit was real. I had to pull the whole 'fake emergency phone call' to get the hell out of there. FML

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Today, I found out the girl I’ve spent so much time bending over backwards for lied about having to work on Valentine’s. She went on a date with another guy instead. Furious, I went to Lowe’s and bought red paint to douse on her car. I cut my hand and had to get stitches trying to open the case. I can never win. FML

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Today, I had to drive 40-odd miles to my grown-ass son's house to kill a large spider on the wall. It had him trapped in his bedroom because his wife had already gone to work. How did I ever raise such a wuss? FML

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Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

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Today, my doctor called and asked me when I could have my broken hand x-rayed again. I said the ER staff had told me it was a bad sprain over two weeks ago. I'm now in a full cast, and have to have my partially healed bones re-broken. There goes my summer. FML

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