Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I started stroking the back of his neck with both of my hands. He told me, "Your hands are nice and smooth like my grandmother's." FML
TheGrizzliBear
Mr 29 years-old In a relationship
trina
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Andrew
United States
Today, I was cuddling with the guy I'm dating and said, "You smell good." His response, "You don't." FML
unimpressed bride
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Traverse City, United States
Cool your jets
Today, it's been two weeks since I got married. It's also two weeks since my husband got cold feet about moving in together, because he thinks the sudden change would be too emotionally distressing for his cat. FML