"Who wants a dessert?" By Lewis - 27/12/2018 00:30 - France - Paris I made a huge mistake... I agree, your life sucks 295 You deserved it 89 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 125 You deserved it 3 782
Today, somebody grabbed my phone out of my hands and ran away with it. I'm a cross country runner, albeit one with stress fractures, but I was able to catch up with them and get my phone back. Unfortunately, the running aggravated my stress fractures and I have to get a plaster cast. Merry fricking Christmas. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 149 You deserved it 108
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been in love with for the past two years. Five minutes in, he passed out on top of me from a pain pill overdose and had a mini seizure. He finally woke up and groans, "Those bastards! They confiscated my clothes!" FML I agree, your life sucks 31 630 You deserved it 5 451
Today, I forgot my headphones at home. When I got to work I found out that today was also the day the band next door had decided to practice their only song for 8 hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 590 You deserved it 946
Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML I agree, your life sucks 40 900 You deserved it 16 888
Today, I received a three-time forwarded message, which I thought would turn out to be a random chain message. Turns out my boyfriend didn't want to send me the "break-up text" himself and figured it would get to me eventually after sending it to all my best friends. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 571 You deserved it 2 537
you dessert it! :)
Soooo cute