When I try to quit junk food By Lewis - 08/12/2018 18:00 I'm not a quitter! I agree, your life sucks 282 You deserved it 94 Share Tweet Share
Today, I met my new neighbor while taking out the trash. Trying to be friendly, I said, “Hey, I think we share a wall!” He replied, “Yeah, I know. I can hear every time you cry while listening to Sufjan Stevens.” FML I agree, your life sucks 259 You deserved it 203
Today, I was rejected by my crush at work, because I'm "too ripped." FML I agree, your life sucks 851 You deserved it 375
Today, I held the door open for a woman and her kids on my way out of the bank. She started accusing me of patronizing her, and when I just let go of the door in protest, she deliberately leaned in so it hit her in the face. I felt the glares from the entire bank as she pretended to cry. FML I agree, your life sucks 51 169 You deserved it 4 043
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML I agree, your life sucks 19 581 You deserved it 84 269
Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML I agree, your life sucks 53 050 You deserved it 10 088
Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 007 You deserved it 2 252
Yup that's me when there is white chocolate in the house 😋