Love: Today, when confronting my boyfriend about slapping a girl's...

By aurora320 - 19/07/2016 19:50 - United Kingdom - Bournemouth

Today, when confronting my boyfriend about slapping a girl's ass in the club, he claimed: "There was a mosquito on it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 868

You deserved it 1 399

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Same thing different taste

By Don’t Think About It. - 26/08/2019 16:00

Today, I smacked a big mosquito that had landed on my leg. My boyfriend then said to me, "I wonder if their mouth snaps off when you slap them, and now it’s stuck in your skin." Thanks. Thanks a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 423

You deserved it 230

By Anonymous - 19/03/2012 00:49 - United States - Dansville

Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 994

You deserved it 4 110

Big yikes

By Anonymous - 22/04/2026 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I slapped my boyfriend’s ass as he was getting out of the shower and came away with shit on my finger. Bear in mind this was AFTER he'd showered, when he’s supposed to be all clean, yet he had enough shit there to get on my finger from patting his cheeks. Not his crack, his cheeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 575

You deserved it 95

By tickyette - 14/09/2010 07:27 - United States

Today, a grasshopper jumped into my car. As my boyfriend swiped at it, the grasshopper jumped onto my chest and into my shirt. Instead of helping me get it out, my boyfriend leaned back and said, "It got to second base faster than I did." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 252

You deserved it 10 357

Bitten

By Anonymous - 02/09/2019 00:01 - Spain - Barcelona

Today, I had to explain to a lady that the reason I mindlessly touched my crotch was to itch a mosquito bite. She didn't believe me, and called me a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 420

You deserved it 544

By anonymous - 04/10/2017 20:51

Today, my boyfriend keeps trying to convince me that the hickey on his neck was from his friend attacking him with a vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 519

You deserved it 435

Headshot!

By almyric - 02/10/2019 12:02

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a foot massage. I learned that his feet are ticklish when he kicked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 474

You deserved it 301

By ThisIsWhyIStayAtHome - 24/05/2014 00:09 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 358

You deserved it 3 413

Marking territory

By Anonymous - 02/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, while on a picnic with my boyfriend, he got a little drunk. All of a sudden, he got up, pulled his pants down and pissed all over me. His excuse? "Just marking my territory." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 776

You deserved it 348

By awkardtaco - 28/09/2018 13:30

Today, in spite of 2 different types of bug spray, underwear, and jeans, I discovered not one, but two mosquito bites on my vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 651

You deserved it 238

TeraBaap 21

Wednesday 20 July 2016 12:09

Tell him he has a mosquito on his face and do the same.

stryder9090 28

Wednesday 20 July 2016 12:24

Well you wouldn't want anyone to suffer the pain of mosquito bite on their ass would you?

Comments

waleedma 18

Wednesday 20 July 2016 22:57

Wawoooo he has great eye sight!

wonandonly 11

Wednesday 20 July 2016 23:01

"He's just preventing Zika from spreading"

interesting33 36

Wednesday 20 July 2016 23:10

People who pinch or slap girls' asses in clubs are the worst. It is horrible - and normally you don't even know who did it

Triplegoddess11 13

Thursday 21 July 2016 4:21

It's funny, but I sincerely hope he doesn't believe you're that stupid!!

mcruff 12

Thursday 21 July 2016 4:45

Why do the assholes have to be so clever?

angbelles 5

Thursday 21 July 2016 5:25

You mean ex-boyfriend right?? Because who would seriously stay with a guy like that. Sorry OP, you deserve better.

nonamebranding 12

Thursday 21 July 2016 6:48

Then you slap his face and tell him it's the same mosquito. He's a creep.

Sparx1_1 16

Thursday 21 July 2016 8:26

If he can lie this easily over the things you can see imagine how easily he'll like about things you are not around to see.

MiraRose 20

Thursday 21 July 2016 9:50

I hope you dumped his ass OP. That's completely ridiculous!

HolyyMolyy 13

Thursday 21 July 2016 10:01

He found a mosquito on a girl's ass in a club? He's definitely got a brilliant vision ;)

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I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 123