Love: Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed....

By Mouhahaa - 09/05/2012 03:48 - France

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 383

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

monicadempsy 5

Wednesday 9 May 2012 8:41

Rule #331 Do not take food from a womans plate.

onlychildFTW 33

Wednesday 9 May 2012 8:42

Never take food from a woman's plate or anyone's plate without asking. Especially when she's armed!

Comments

midnight21 8

Thursday 10 May 2012 0:20

Hahahahahahahahahahaha YES!!

polkadot3155 6

Thursday 10 May 2012 0:25

Mental image *joey doesn't share food!*

misshighjinks 5

Thursday 10 May 2012 0:27

Never touch the food.

stepymac 15

Thursday 10 May 2012 0:43

Never take food from a woman's plate it turns into a trip to the nurses office

dharmaxxx 2

Thursday 10 May 2012 1:37

"you cross my chow zone again. you'll pull back a bloody stump."

Thuban 0

Thursday 10 May 2012 1:37

My wife would just shrug this off and jack my chocolate later. Stabbing your hand for anything, not what happens in a loving relationship.

Garytru 0

Thursday 10 May 2012 2:56

Your greedy.

jquiggy89 3

Thursday 10 May 2012 3:37

I've been slapped with a hot greasy spatula over some bacon at my house before.

shanhigh 2

Thursday 10 May 2012 4:00

omfg...what is wrong with your wife...she has SERIOUS problems!! you don't just stab someone with a fork....

dakotahgillmore 0

Thursday 10 May 2012 4:16

That's my girlfriend

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Health Painful Kids Awkward Miscellaneous Cops Money Insomnia Doctor Family Parents Work Annoying Food Love Friends Relatable AITA LGBTQIA+ Embarrassing First Dates Cheating Frustration Religion School Porn Transportation Cars Intimacy Sex

The Top

Today, I noticed that the glasses I got this week seemed off balance. A further inspection showed that one of my ears is bigger than the other. Through even further inspection, my family concluded that the entire right side of my body is higher than my left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 546

You deserved it 176

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 555

You deserved it 61 259

Today, I’m living out of a suitcase this week, so that my ex-boyfriend, who moved across the country and was going to stay with me for a little while, can quarantine in my house with his girlfriend, who I requested wasn’t in my house in the first place. They didn’t ask, just decided while I wasn’t home that it was okay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 446

Today, my friend told me she wanted to get pregnant. I thought that was good news, but then she said she wanted my boyfriend to be the father of her baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 915

You deserved it 2 827

Today, I found out I'm pregnant after 14 years of being told I'll likely never have kids. My fiancé has a 7 year-old child with a woman who used it to stop him from leaving her. Yesterday, she filed a false report/restraining order to keep him from his kid, because he refused to leave me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 906

You deserved it 199

Today, we were swimming in gym class. There are some cute girls in our class and they were wearing their bikinis. I was looking at them when I got an erection but since I was underwater I thought no one would see. I'm on the diving team so my teacher asked me to demonstrate a dive to the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 392

You deserved it 17 624