Miscellaneous Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML

Jess - 30/05/2011 15:46 - United States

Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Inappropriate

Pandistoteles - 14/04/2015 21:17 - United States

Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonald's but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML

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cookie_lover_xx - 15/10/2015 06:24 - United States - Chandler

Today, my mom ended up having a midlife crisis. She decided it was finally time to get those tight leather pants that she has always wanted, and is now planning on putting a stripper pole in her room. FML

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dancingqueef - 22/06/2016 02:39 - United States - Kingston

Today, my mom told me to break a leg before performing in my dancing school's show. I really did break part of my leg while performing. FML

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DrunkenMum - 20/07/2019 12:00

Today, I’m on holiday with my mum. She got so pissed, she fell over on the dance floor at the children’s disco, then had to rely on a stranger to keep her upright so I could go get the car to take her home. FML

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FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

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Messiahman - 30/10/2011 01:31 - United States

Today, I was playing twister with my girlfriend at the school carnival. I jokingly squeeze her butt, only to find her mom standing right above us. FML

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Sips unsee juice

Facepalm2020 - 21/06/2020 23:01

Today, my mom asked me what twerking was. When I said that it was a club dance, trying to get out of telling her what it actually was, she begged me to teach her how to do it. My mom complained to my dad, who grounded me for not teaching her to twerk her ass. FML

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Anonymous - 26/07/2019 04:00

Today, I came out of my bedroom to find my mom doing yoga in my hallway. Naked. She doesn't seem to think there's any problem with this. It's my house. FML

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bob - 05/02/2011 12:02 - United States

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

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f_n_fail - 06/12/2016 21:31 - United States

Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML

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khaya 9

Monday 30 May 2011 18:58

Well it could have been worse, she could have started to strip and then demand money.

barmeywashere 0

Monday 30 May 2011 18:58

Speechless o.o

XxxbunnyxxX 0

Monday 30 May 2011 19:12

wow WTF poor little kids and you I'm sorry

goshpeople 4

Monday 30 May 2011 19:13

Let's hope the apple fell far from the tree in this case.

hawright 13

Monday 30 May 2011 19:14

just showing those little kids what their career will ne

keithandra 0

Monday 30 May 2011 19:17

Is she hot? That makes all the difference

phatdaddy62 23

Monday 30 May 2011 21:46

true dat

MsSoulReaper 27

Monday 30 May 2011 19:18

Was there paying customers around?

lmaoatall 6

Monday 30 May 2011 19:21

whatever you do op, keep her away from the swings. especially the toddler bucket ones. I would hate to see what she would do on a slide!!

viivian 3

Monday 30 May 2011 19:21

omg that's so embarrassing! FYL for sure!

borkchop1992 15

Monday 30 May 2011 19:22

sounds like one sexy milf

ohmandapants 16

Monday 30 May 2011 19:26

just giving the kiddies what they want...

Crazy4Christ 0

Monday 30 May 2011 19:31

Eeew, my friends do that. then the little kids see the bigger kids doing it and join in

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I took my motorbike out for the first time ever, after having waited for five weeks for it to be returned from the mechanics. Three hours later and I crashed after getting caught in the rain and hitting an oil patch on the road. Looks like I won't be riding until it's fixed. Again. FML

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Today, I saw a photo of my wife's ex sucking her boobs in her old phone. I'd told her about em, but she appears to have still kept them because it's a year later, and they haven't been deleted. FML

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Today, around 2:00 a.m. I had just sat down on my couch when I noticed one of my cats poking at what appeared to be a toy. I attempted to pick it up to play with the cat when it started to move like a mouse. I squealed like a girl and woke up my wife upstairs. I'm a 26-year-old man. FML

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Today, just like every other day, I was woken up 2 hours earlier than I needed to be, by the alarm belonging to my upstairs neighbors. They won't wake up until their real alarm goes off: me, pounding the walls and yelling in frustration. FML

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Today, I came home from an eight month deployment to find my wife four months into her pregnancy. She actually thinks that I believe it's mine. FML

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Today, it's my birthday. After a day out partying, I came home to find all my stuff smashed in the yard, even my 42" plasma TV. After asking my girlfriend what her problem was, she said a "slut" left a message on the machine stating how fun last night was. It turned out to be my mom. FML

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