Miscellaneous: Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate...

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 909

You deserved it 3 495

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Same thing different taste

By Yoda - 08/07/2011 05:23 - United States

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 981

You deserved it 4 900

By Anonymous - 09/03/2011 01:15 - United States

Today, my dad bought a one hundred dollar collectible light-saber. He plays with it. In the front yard. With sound effects. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 776

You deserved it 7 955

Stop right now!

By Anonymous - 02/06/2013 22:36 - United Kingdom - Grays

Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me screaming, "My precious!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 022

You deserved it 7 584

By Mak10 - 21/08/2009 05:18 - United States

Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and asked, "Who am I?" He then replied, "An idiot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 495

You deserved it 51 208

By :$ - 06/08/2012 22:08 - Canada - Niagara Falls

Today, I had to scream for my dad to come help me, after I got my hair caught in a fan while trying to make the Darth Vader voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 999

You deserved it 35 159

By Kyle - 05/01/2012 06:58 - United States

Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 928

You deserved it 35 976

He knows the price of everything and the value of nothing

By padmelover - 27/08/2022 22:00

Today, my dad said I need to stop playing with toys and threw my lightsaber out of the window. It was a replica of the Lightsaber used by Mark Hamill, made from the same type handle from a 1970s camera, just like the film prop. It was over 40 years-old and worth thousands. Not anymore, as it's now scratched and in two pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 581

You deserved it 208

By scarletdurose88 - 19/04/2009 21:47 - United States

Today, is my 21st birthday. I get home after my night out and walk into the garage to see a 2002 Red Corvette convertible. I run up to the car thinking its a gift and there's a note: "Dani this is not your birthday present. Quit drooling on my car. -Dad" Thanks Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 790

You deserved it 13 805

By Anonymous - 04/12/2009 05:12 - United States

Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 848

You deserved it 3 257

By Fuzzy - 08/01/2010 07:56 - Australia

Today, I was watching Star Wars : Attack of the Clones, and Yoda was using the force to move a heavy object. While in the middle of my loungeroom, I instinctively put my hand up to use the force to help him, infront of my father and sister. My sister will never let me live it down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 143

You deserved it 39 931

perdix 29

Monday 17 January 2011 16:22

So, your mom is Princess "Lay Ya?"

mea_iloveskiing 26

Monday 17 January 2011 16:21

is your name luke? :D

Comments

percawesome 0

Monday 17 January 2011 16:30

Yeah it looks so naked without it! :(

smexykero 0

Monday 17 January 2011 16:30

I was wondering about that too. maybe op liked what happened.

percawesome 0

Monday 17 January 2011 16:32

And you said: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" and then he cut your arm with a plastic lightsaber, right? Right?

UpsidedownKayak 9

Monday 17 January 2011 16:56

Then he yelled, "That's impossible!" He jump into a trash shoot and waited for his sister to pick him up.

percawesome 0

Monday 17 January 2011 17:22

How epic would it be to watch this go down in a star wars store... hahah

UpsidedownKayak 9

Monday 17 January 2011 17:40

If The Empire Strikes Back theme was also playing at the exact time this went down, then Obie Wan's (the father's) failure would have been complete.

ArtOfDesire 7

Monday 17 January 2011 16:34

Did anyone else notice that it doesn't end in "FML"?

DocBastard 38

Monday 17 January 2011 16:37

Yes, vitorsaraiva, percawesome, and smexykero did. :)

trumpet27 1

Sunday 12 March 2017 20:36

it does, actually

Maravilla4 1

Monday 17 January 2011 17:00

Hahahhahahahahaha!!!!! A least u know now.... #12 r u Steven Garcia

twilightluvr101 4

Tuesday 3 April 2012 22:31

Are you from dumont.......

LemonStarship 5

Monday 17 January 2011 17:10

Ahahaha

DakotaCat 4

Monday 17 January 2011 17:16

****** your life is!

sculp91 0

Monday 17 January 2011 17:22

haha your moms a hussy!!

jadedasian13 0

Tuesday 18 January 2011 16:51

Truth?

talktomandybaby 8

Tuesday 18 January 2011 19:07

omg.i never have met a grown man that would theirpicture with a justin bieber card board cut out...dude!! i love you!!!!

bladomas 2

Monday 17 January 2011 17:28

i agree with #24 , FYL, and that means that your 'dad' ****** your mom instead of your 'stepdad'

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 17 January 2011 18:35

Oh Lord. I don't think this is worded the way you meant it.

Arschloch04 0

Monday 17 January 2011 19:34

Ahaha! I love the way you worded this.

savvyjiggly11 0

Monday 17 January 2011 17:33

deuce, at least it was an epic way of telling you :)

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The Top

Today, I drunkenly buried my girlfriend's recently deceased cat. Later she asked to see it and came back inside crying. It turns out I didn't bury it completely and its two back legs were poking out of the dirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 647

You deserved it 46 815

Today, I was on a hot date. After we finished supper, we went back to his place. My stomach started to feel upset, so I politely asked where the bathroom was so I could "powder my nose;" After ten minutes of agonizing diarrhea, I looked down and noticed he was out of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 733

You deserved it 4 972

Today, my boss yelled at me for leaving on time. After months of management hounding us about our overtime, I get in trouble for doing what I was supposed to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 944

You deserved it 535

Today, my boss confirmed he is a micro-managing asshole. We walked into the office together and I turned on the lights. He switched them off and switched them on again, just to make sure that I did it right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 070

You deserved it 1 674

Today, I saw the woman I asked out last month in a relationship with another guy. She rejected me because she “wanted to focus on herself.” I texted her and asked why she had lied to me. She responded with, “Okay, you caught me. But can you blame me? I’m not attracted to butt ugly Martian-looking men.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 731

Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year-old man with a beer belly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 651

You deserved it 14 911

Same thing different taste

Stop right now!

He knows the price of everything and the value of nothing

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