Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend and I tried oral sex for the first time.... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By anon - 03/02/2016 03:11 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my boyfriend and I tried oral sex for the first time. On my turn, I did a great job and he told me it was the best orgasm he's ever had. When it came to my turn, however, he couldn't do it because the feeling in his mouth made him gag. My my how the tables turn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 0

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Trauma Accident Kids Embarrassing Work Money You're fired Teenagers Pranks Poopoo peepee Transportation Sex Intimacy NSFW Parenting Cheating Love Family Fight Miscellaneous Awkward Lonely Shopping AITA Make up Dreams Medication Liar Weird Weddings

The Top

The Top

Today, I was waiting for a delivery between 9am-8pm. At 7:30 pm, I finally decided to have a 3 minute (desperately needed) shower. During which time the delivery man came. I ran down the street in a towel that barely covered me. He was driving away looking at me in the mirror laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 884

You deserved it 11 218

Today, after much debate, my husband convinced me to let his scumbag brother babysit our seven-year-old son while we went out to a restaurant. When we got home, we found him teaching our son how to pick the lock to our liquor cabinet. My husband is unapologetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 269

You deserved it 4 055

Today, I found out that my parents are 28,000 dollars in debt and that my bank account has $27.17 in it. They took my money to help pay their debt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 980

You deserved it 3 345

Today, I paid a social visit to my grandparents. While we were watching the news, a story came on about the Queen of England. I scoffed, "How is she not dead already? How old is she, anyway?" My grandmother replied, "About my age." Oops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 560

You deserved it 42 812

Today, I accompanied a friend to the hospital to visit the guy I like, who was just out of surgery and still high. When he asked who we were, my friend immediately said that I was his wife. He then started bawling, saying, "Oh God! No! What did I do to deserve this?!?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 606

You deserved it 541

Today, I felt an itch on my butt so I went to the bathroom to scratch it. It was actually a dried layer of skin that broke from years of wear and tear, and now every time I shit I feel immense pain for the next hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 170