Miscellaneous: Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around...

By squishy - 11/02/2010 00:07 - United States

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 479

You deserved it 25 618

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Same thing different taste

By Zedscar - 15/07/2017 22:30 - United States - Martinsburg

Today, my 8-year-old nephew told me he liked the way I smelt. Apparently I smell like "cat food and cheese." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 882

You deserved it 652

By Noname - 03/02/2009 20:25 - United States

Today, my 4 year old niece asked me why I didn't have a job or wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 747

You deserved it 7 811

Bad guy

By Anonymous - 02/11/2024 03:00 - Canada

Today, I was babysitting my 4 year-old niece, who rudely but cutely asked me why my nose is so big. Trying to make light of it, I told her, "It's because I lie a lot, just like Pinocchio." Now she won’t stop asking who I lied to and told my sister and her husband that I’m a "bad guy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 506

By girlmeetsworld - 18/02/2009 23:27 - United States

Today, my four-year-old cousin gave me a hug, basically stuffing his face into my crotch. Then he pulled it out and said "Ew, that's stinky" in front of my entire class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 149

You deserved it 13 665

Motherly odor

By Anonymous - 07/11/2025 15:00

Today, my daughter said, “Mommy, you’re my favorite person!” Then she added, “Because you smell like mac and cheese.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 114

By anon - 23/03/2015 02:24 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 351

You deserved it 2 943

By sigsigsignify - 06/12/2018 14:00

Today, my 3 year old future niece was combing my hair while I was watching a movie with the future in-laws. She kept leaving saying she was going to "go get the comb wet". I assumed she meant in the bathroom sink. Turns out she was just going around behind the couch and licking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 488

You deserved it 440

Nice of her

By Bill - 06/12/2009 20:28 - United States

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 972

You deserved it 18 131

By Anonymous - 12/04/2017 16:00

Today, my 3-year-old niece brushed my hair, making sure to be gentle so she wouldn't hurt me. When it was time to brush the front, she made sure to meticulously brush my mustache. I'm a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 329

You deserved it 1 054

By Lickmebaby - 12/02/2017 11:00 - United Kingdom - Enfield

Today, I woke up to see my 8-year-old cousin licking my hand. All of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 767

You deserved it 524

MadaZer0 8

Thursday 11 February 2010 9:45

Hey at least your liked.

MermaidSongXOXO 6

Thursday 11 February 2010 9:48

That's why I like you around, too :) *Steals chicken wing from underneath OP's fat rolls.*

Comments

happybillie 0

Sunday 4 July 2010 18:45

that's awful!D:

Macromartyr 3

Saturday 17 July 2010 20:59

LMFAO op is blaaaaaaack

Kasevam 0

Thursday 2 September 2010 4:20

If you're squishy and always smell like fried chicken, it's probably because you eat a crapload of fried chicken. If not, I'd suggest going to a doctor.

fusebox 0

Friday 17 June 2011 19:12

* Muay Thai.

streetllama 4

Saturday 2 July 2011 1:09

Dat sounds like a fat black lady

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Thursday 1 December 2011 22:44

Normally I'd say FYL for being "squishy", but in this case YDI for smelling like fried chicken. Seriously, don't you bathe?

tatertot33 8

Friday 1 June 2012 16:06

R u black?

laya_fml 26

Thursday 31 January 2013 23:02

I thought this was mildly funny..... And then I saw it was from Georgia and thought it was hilarious. (Sorry to all you Georgians out there. I know I sound like an asshole.)