Intimacy: Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't... - FML

By TheEnglishOne - 23/01/2009 00:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 871

You deserved it 8 730

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Same thing different taste

By iFail - 29/01/2009 17:55 - United States

Today, a guy sitting next to me in class asked me for a pen. I accidentally handed him a tampon instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 789

You deserved it 9 025

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 014

You deserved it 28 799

By Elizabeth - 11/12/2008 05:13 - France

Today, a girl in my class turned around and said, "Wow, you've got your photo on a rubber! That's amazing!" The rubber was designed to look like a £10 note, and the picture was of the Queen of England. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 070

You deserved it 2 515

Slipping up

By englishfail - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was teaching a class when a student pointed out that I'd used the wrong "your/you're" while writing on the board. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 512

You deserved it 48 537

By boner - 01/02/2010 20:51 - United States

Today, I was spacing out in French class and randomly got an erection. My professor called on me to stand up at the front of the room and say, "I am wearing a belt," in French. Not everyone was observing just my belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 683

You deserved it 6 187

Cool look

By d0rk_ - 02/09/2011 20:44 - Canada

Today, I was in English class when I had to use the bathroom. As I was signing out, the teacher said, "Don't forget the hall pass!" It was a plunger. I had to walk across the school with a plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 488

You deserved it 5 257

By bloodyfreakinawful - 14/12/2012 06:40 - United States - Seabrook

Today, in class, I reached into my bag to pull out a tampon, which I hid under my sleeve so I could make a quick escape to the restroom. My teacher yelled at me, because she thought I'd taken out my phone. I then had to prove myself by showing the tampon to the whole class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 993

You deserved it 3 206

By myself - 20/09/2012 07:00 - United States - Seaside

Spicy

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 472

You deserved it 31 260

Sex ed

By Anonymous - 23/03/2013 00:34 - United States

Spicy

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 414

You deserved it 6 882

Huge balls

By Anonymous - 10/10/2021 19:04 - United States

Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 308

You deserved it 149

Next

Top comments

Gherto 0

Tuesday 3 February 2009 23:35

Oh yeah, I used to confused by this from time to time back when I lived in the U.K.

Tygastyle 0

Wednesday 18 February 2009 2:17

yes, the Beatles are totally still relevant to teenagers! they'll be around forever i think....i'll at least introduce my kids and yeah a rubber can be considered an eraser....it erases the chances of getting pregnant...?!

Comments

haley188118 0

Saturday 2 October 2010 20:18

I feel bad that you went to America rather then Canada, Canada is just so much better!

wilcas713 0

Monday 15 November 2010 12:03

agreed, canadas amazing. but #1s still england and american english still suckss

GooeyChickenman 0

Monday 29 November 2010 12:03

since when did rubber mean condom?

Fuck3d278 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 20:01

Hasn't happened to me yet, but I was homeschooled cuz as you know they start earlier over there... But all my friends hate it when I use british words.

sykopyro69 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 2:57

hahahahahahahahahahahaha learn our deviant ways

hahagirl1 11

Tuesday 15 March 2011 13:44

how can your comment be number 19 and have you address comment number 24. weird :/

Madmattmania 0

Sunday 27 March 2011 19:02

beatles are soft music

adrianblackett 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 0:30

hmm ....arrite den

volcom808 0

Wednesday 30 March 2011 7:58

canada is for fairies

awesomeloser14 0

Monday 18 April 2011 7:32

what?? no one calls condoms rubber here.

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Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 102

Today, I got my eyebrow pierced. By a fish hook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 514

You deserved it 5 114

Today, I walked into a public toilet and I opened a stall door, only to discover someone who had forgotten to lock the door sitting on the can. Instead of saying "Sorry," I panicked and said, "Nice shoes!" I then had to wait until they left because I was too embarrassed to face them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 178

Today, I got turned down by a woman I like because she said a man in his mid 30’s who’s not already married with kids is a major red flag. I would very much like to be married with kids but it’s just never happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 56

Today, the men clearing the walkway outside my dorm room with a snowblower didn't realize that my window was open. I looked over from my computer to see snow shooting in, covering my clock, closet, and radio. Now it's melting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 008

You deserved it 16 934

Today, my son dropped a firecracker in my flour storage bin, probably thinking the pop would make flour go everywhere. I guess he’s never heard of a dust explosion because what he actually did was set fire to the flour, causing such a violent shockwave it blew the kitchen window out of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 546

You deserved it 84