Intimacy: Today, I was on webcam with my boyfriend and absent-mindedly... - FML

By NotSoSexy - 26/11/2009 00:39 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was on webcam with my boyfriend and absent-mindedly began sucking on a marker. He jokingly told me it was sexy, so I continued while making obscene gestures and moans. Suddenly he began to look nervous. I turned around to see my dad looking at me, disgusted and confused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 430

You deserved it 30 399

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Same thing different taste

By BARF - 27/04/2009 13:51 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having cybersex via webcam with my boyfriend. Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on my finger. Judging by the look on my boyfriend's face, he was getting really into it. As I started getting into it too, I shoved my finger too far down and puked all over my laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 552

You deserved it 130 398

By Hard in flip flops - 21/01/2018 06:00

Spicy

Today, my dad walked in on me jerking off. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I wasn’t Skyping my boyfriend, while both of us were totally naked. I had just told him to “put those toes in your mouth and I’ll cum like you’ve never seen before”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 938

You deserved it 4 772

Ahem

By Bucko321 - 30/03/2009 01:18 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 751

You deserved it 78 368

Didn't see you there

By eatmyshipoopie - 18/12/2009 15:20 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 701

You deserved it 10 179

Listening in

By Anonymous - 20/11/2012 03:19 - Sweden - Stockholm

Spicy

Today, my long-distance boyfriend and I decided to be a bit naughty on Skype. It was 3am so we assumed that my dad was asleep and did some dirty talk. When we were done, I heard my dad laughing outside my room; he'd heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 551

You deserved it 17 472

By lovely321 - 02/04/2011 19:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was giving a strip tease over Skype to my boyfriend. My mom walked in mid-way through, took a long look at me, said hi to my boyfriend, and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 728

You deserved it 50 144

Danger zone

By didntevenknow - 13/08/2012 15:06 - Malaysia - Kuala Lumpur

Spicy

Today, I was fooling around on Omegle, when I came across a guy who claimed he could suck himself off. I was doubtful, but morbidly curious, so I told him to prove it. Turns out he could. Before I could close the browser window in horror, my dad walked in and got a good look too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 582

You deserved it 38 184

Knock next time please

By Anonymous - 09/11/2020 21:32 - India

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 826

By thefuckedupbunny - 18/08/2019 20:00

Spicy

Today, while on the train with my dad, my boyfriend sent me a message. It was a nude, and when I looked, my dad saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 747

You deserved it 908

Caught in 4K

By Oops - 03/01/2016 19:09 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. I wanted to tease him, so I got his attention and made my orgasm face when I thought no one was looking. His thirteen year-old cousin saw and now bursts out laughing whenever he sees me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 299

You deserved it 19 615

Next

Top comments

Jannick_fml 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 9:13

[double facepalm]

DameGreyWulf 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 9:09

[facepalm]

Comments

happyhak 5

Friday 27 November 2009 0:21

[Double Tactical Facepalm]

allmidnighteyes 10

Friday 27 November 2009 9:16

YDI for not locking your door while on sexycam.

Holmstorm 0

Saturday 28 November 2009 0:45

Agreed, sexycam and webcam are totally different. Sexycam requires locked doors.

Ninjaface 0

Friday 27 November 2009 10:18

[FALCON FACEPALM!!!]

Icutu7 0

Sunday 29 November 2009 19:53

should have said"you wanna join" lol

HarperGirl 4

Monday 30 November 2009 15:51

lol

COBRAMORPH 0

Saturday 5 December 2009 10:24

Yeah, I bet he is glad to know he has a **** for a daughter.

Sekococo 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 15:41

[ facepalm- ni-jutus]

cjHidalgo 0

Saturday 27 February 2010 21:58

lmfaaoooooooooo

2gether4ever 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 3:43

aha, fail !

peace7love2FML 0

Friday 12 March 2010 7:19

exactly.

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The Top

The Top

Today, I leaned back in my chair during a meeting to appear (and feel) more relaxed. Instead, the chair tipped over, and I went down like a tree in slow motion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 458

Today, I'm scared to leave my bedroom. During the night, what must have been a giant spider made a web 4 feet wide stretching from the lightbulb to the tv and then down to the desk corner. It's blocking my path to the door and I can't tell where the 8-legged bastard is hiding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 752

You deserved it 436

Today, my boss expected me to corroborate her lie to a customer. She changed her story suddenly and I got caught up in the crosshairs. Then she got mad at me for not understanding what just happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 869

You deserved it 2 268

Today, as usual, my wife only wants to have sex to reproduce. As soon as she falls pregnant, the shop is closed. She doesn't care about my sexual needs, saying if I was really that horny, I should go sleep with some else. I'm not that guy and if I do get the guts to do so, I‘m afraid she will hold it against me, and take the kids and our savings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 192

Today, my church friends ditched me to go skiing with a bunch of jewish basketball players from another school. They said I’d "harsh the vibe" with my "principles". The photos they post online look like they’re having a lot of fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 1 176

Today, I realized I apologize too often as I said I was sorry to my boyfriend as he broke up with me. I apologized for being sad and making him feel bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 486

You deserved it 5 753