Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down... - FML

By Courtney - 04/02/2012 20:22 - Reserved

Today, I tried to inconspicuously hock a loogie. It went down my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 464

You deserved it 34 705

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Same thing different taste

By pantyripper - 24/03/2014 12:39 - Australia - Essendon

Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 323

You deserved it 21 693

By Anonymous - 22/09/2011 13:55 - Australia

Today, I was expecting my period. To avoid the embarrassment of everyone in the office finding out, instead of putting tampons in my bag, I hid one in my bra. It fell out while I was coming back from lunch. I am now known to all as "The Tampon Dispenser". FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 956

You deserved it 34 050

Snap!

By fryebaby623 - 13/11/2015 05:47 - United States - Vero Beach

Today, I was so tired when I got home from work, I took off my bra without removing my shirt which I've done so often it is second nature. I successfully removed the bra, then snagged the clasp on a loose shirt thread, causing my bra to take on a life of its own and slap me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 309

You deserved it 3 226

Pick me!

By Anonymous - 13/05/2021 17:01

Today, I wore my tightest, slightly too small, push-up bra and low cut top to impress a guy at work. He came over to borrow a pen. I leaned down to get one out of my bag and my nipple popped out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 277

You deserved it 2 006

By Anonymous - 07/11/2015 05:02 - Canada - Barrie

Today, my 9 year old shitblossom of a sister decided to wake me up by hocking a loogie into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 777

You deserved it 1 847

What are you doing?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 632

You deserved it 12 961

Malfunctioning equipment

By Alyxandrea Loffer - 24/09/2020 01:02 - United States - Ellsworth

Today, at work, my front-close bra popped open like an anime character, right in front of the two male coworkers I was talking to. My boobs flung around and I had to pretend nothing happened while subtly crossing my arms and waiting for them to leave so I could fix it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 581

You deserved it 306

By Kurda - 23/05/2015 02:26 - United States - Wallburg

Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 530

You deserved it 2 768

By Itsbeen8years - 05/04/2015 19:18 - Slovakia - Stupava

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 977

You deserved it 3 875

By brooke - 13/08/2012 04:45 - United States

Today, while out at dinner with my boyfriend, I accidentally ripped out my tampon picking a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 469

You deserved it 25 243

Next

Top comments

jasony0423 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:18

You're a classy woman, aren't ya?

IIRoxieII 12

Sunday 5 February 2012 1:15

Saving it for later?

Comments

hahaha1699 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 14:15

why would a girl hack a lugie thats sick(not as in awesome)

beckaxoxo 5

Sunday 5 February 2012 17:47

thats not lady like..thats fucken sick wow

thewifey310 7

Sunday 5 February 2012 18:26

Thts y girls shuldnt hock loogies.!! Well atleast in my opinion.

pagullarka 9

Sunday 5 February 2012 20:11

You must not have found someone who really loves you because when you find that person they would do stuff for you without you even asking. :')

Emperorerror 8

Sunday 5 February 2012 23:26

Everyone's like "ugh why would a girl hock [do you mean 'hack'?] a loogie?!!1!?" I mean to say, why would ANYONE hack a loogie - it's ******* disgusting.

chels1994 11

Monday 6 February 2012 1:18

Attractive

PsychWithAnO 9

Monday 6 February 2012 1:57

Totally sympathize; I've done that. It's so gross.

HateLife66 0

Monday 6 February 2012 5:10

Dutty lol

yaoifreak 8

Monday 6 February 2012 5:12

Hahaha!!!!

Sweet_Rvng 9

Monday 6 February 2012 5:36

*insert me gusta face*

Ghostsofascalon 4

Monday 6 February 2012 7:15

Beg' pardon?

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Today, a guy asked me my name and I told him it's Holly. He then asked if I was "real or a Holligram?" Apparently, The Office is the best, and only place to get pick up lines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 489

You deserved it 277

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 850

You deserved it 83 249

Today, I ordered a plain cheeseburger. The cashier was confused, so I explained, "Just meat and cheese." When I got my food, my burger didn't have a bun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 508

You deserved it 1 945

Today, I got an email back at 3 a.m. from a university I applied for, saying that I got in on a provisional basis. That provision was that I had to provide certain documents to prove my prior learning. The due date for the documents was yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 92

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing, "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall…" Before I could say "…asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 639

You deserved it 16 035

Today, I bumped into a man on the street. I apologized and he picked up his wallet. To clear the awkward silence, I pointed out that his wallet looked like mine. It wasn't until I was on the next street that I realized it was my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 362

You deserved it 10 773