Health: Today, I took a nap on the couch in the family room. My brother...

By ouch - 03/01/2011 00:36 - United States

Today, I took a nap on the couch in the family room. My brother thought it would be hilarious to take clear packaging tape and put it on my chapped lips. Then rip it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 657

You deserved it 2 994

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By finalfantasy - 21/06/2018 17:30 - United States - Aurora

Today, my brother thought it would be absolutely hilarious to replace my cold sore cream with superglue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 873

You deserved it 271

Precision strike

By argfarblewarblearble - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 287

You deserved it 2 407

By ow - 17/01/2010 05:25 - United States

Today, I learned that when you put duct tape over your mouth because you are bored, it really hurts taking it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 252

You deserved it 69 824

By Ep1cF4ce - 26/07/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My older brother and his friends lit my slippers on fire. While I was wearing them. They even took a video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 116

You deserved it 3 426

Revenge

By Natasha - 20/02/2021 21:30

Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 100

You deserved it 125

By luckycharmed - 17/06/2014 17:34 - United States

Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 782

You deserved it 4 396

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 04:01 - Canada - Brampton

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 346

You deserved it 2 590

Cool nickname

By nearsighted-ut - 26/09/2019 02:00

Today, I was watching TV when my older brother thought it would be funny to rip a bare-assed fart in my face before a shower. I looked up, only to see a brown blob on my glasses. My nickname is now "Shitfaced." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 957

You deserved it 129

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 464

You deserved it 28 118

By girl on fire - 03/09/2015 00:32

Today, my idiot kid brother set my shirt on fire with a magnifying glass while I was taking a nap outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 436

You deserved it 2 727

EvenHopeHides 0

Monday 3 January 2011 9:35

you should take clear packaging tape on his pubes, then rip it off

tygerarmy 35

Monday 3 January 2011 9:23

Besides the initial pain are you ok? Just get your brother back. He's gotta sleep sometime.

Comments

bfflrhea 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 23:32

ouchh!!

MakowskiBro 0

Wednesday 5 January 2011 11:14

someone can't hang :)

NINJAPROTOTYPE10 0

Sunday 30 January 2011 22:06

no.... she just got a free lip removal

serenaluvspie 0

Friday 25 March 2011 4:15

wow ur mean that gotta hurt for her u r a retard

superguppy19 3

Monday 18 April 2011 16:32

if I was him I would have taped u to the chair

llZombiell 5

Monday 22 August 2011 13:13

Lol that is pretty funny

domlib66 0

Saturday 5 November 2011 21:14

holy ****** shit that mustve hurt like hell

scarlettblondii 7

Saturday 12 November 2011 3:20

Actually thats supposed to be good for removing dead skin.

shinolie 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 4:52

Fail

rachilio 26

Tuesday 31 July 2012 4:21

DAAAMMMNNNNN. That shit just ripped ur lips off...

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Kids Parenting Poopoo peepee Family Cheating Love Fight NSFW Intimacy Awkward Sex Lonely Shopping AITA Work Make up Money Miscellaneous Dreams Medication Liar Weird Weddings Embarrassing Anniversary Health Confused Healthy Lifestyle Neighbours Noise

The Top

Today, my husband finally broke our two-month dry spell. I don't know what's more depressing: the fact that it had been two months or that he's horrible at sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 296

You deserved it 2 801

Today, I found out that me and my best friend are both pregnant. We live together, and both had one night stands with the same guy. Now we are going to be each raising his children in the same house while he has decided to "not get involved" and move to a different state. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 785

You deserved it 82 758

Today, I decided to get a Blizzard from Dairy Queen. As bent down to put my pen away, my Blizzard somehow defied the laws of gravity and fell on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 255

You deserved it 4 263

Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 658

You deserved it 38 159

Today, I woke up really early before my mom so I could make pancakes for Mother's Day. I placed everything on a tray and even picked a flower, had a card for her and took it to her bedroom. She said, "You shouldn't have, pancakes are fattening." She took one bite and fed the rest to the dogs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 319

You deserved it 4 254

Today, I was supposed to talk to my girlfriend's mom to ask permission to date her daughter but I chickened out. We've been together for almost a year, but have not been on a real date because I am too damn scared of her family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 968

You deserved it 46 183

Same thing different taste

Precision strike

Revenge

Cool nickname

Top comments

Comments