Work: Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML

By littleman - 06/04/2012 11:32 - United States

Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 470

You deserved it 2 988

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Same thing different taste

Skill issue

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 729

You deserved it 1 924

Autobodyshaming

By Anonymous - 06/05/2021 16:59

Today, I'm officially fat enough I have to lift my belly out of the way to get to my zipper when I need to pee in public toilets. I hate myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 560

Long drive home

By Anonymous - 01/06/2021 04:01 - Australia - Kellyville

Today, at work, I shat myself at my desk thinking it was a fart. I had to waddle down to the parking garage and drive myself home. I’m a grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 412

Better run

By bob the builder - 08/11/2012 14:36 - United States - Ridgeland

Today, I'm at work on a construction site for a high rise building, on the 12th floor today. I've developed a severe case of the runs, causing me to need to rush to the nearest toilet periodically. Luckily for me it's conveniently located on the ground floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 414

You deserved it 1 737

SHAME! SHAME!

By Anonymous - 02/08/2013 21:34 - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 047

You deserved it 5 411

There's always that one dude

By Anonymous - 29/05/2024 16:00 - Ireland

Today, it was my second day at my new job. The bathrooms have urinals, and I usually get bladder shy while using them, but I thought, "When in Rome…" That's when my manager came in, stood at the urinal next to mine, dropped his pants and boxers around his ankles, and started talking about sports. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 113

By Anonymous - 26/09/2012 17:37 - Australia - Engadine

Today, some kid decided to pee in the kids' play area at work. Because I was the shortest employee working at the time, I got to climb through the area to mop it up, while all the kids pointed and laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 421

You deserved it 1 858

By Creepedout - 19/11/2015 03:26 - United States - Wilson

Today, an obese man decided it was okay to share a urinal with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 685

You deserved it 1 663

Walk, don't run

By Anonymous - 19/07/2022 03:00 - Finland

Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 115

By walnutbladder - 07/01/2011 21:46 - United States

Today, I realized that every time I hear running water, I have less than a minute to find a toilet or I'll pee my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 835

You deserved it 4 080

Icejza_DaChilla 7

Friday 6 April 2012 16:09

Perfect username. Just get a foot stool! Problem solved littleman :3

Cad6 24

Friday 6 April 2012 16:14

Urine quite a situation there. I would just piss it off and use the toilet.

Comments

konkoush 7

Saturday 7 April 2012 18:32

So aim up

OffToTheGayBar 9

Sunday 8 April 2012 0:52

Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land in the stars. Or, in this case, the wall.

SxeDaze 13

Sunday 8 April 2012 1:38

Pull your "littleman" back and aim high, problem solved. (men get this)

lemonsquid 6

Sunday 8 April 2012 4:38

You must be short :)

hurrican_fml 0

Sunday 8 April 2012 5:36

And how exactly did you find this out?

4ugu4 7

Sunday 8 April 2012 8:56

Hey, at least you can reach the girls-yeah nvm.

theSPSstudios 7

Sunday 8 April 2012 12:46

Short how? height or...

Bal00ba 2

Sunday 8 April 2012 22:48

I know the feel man...it sucks having to stay on toes in front of a urinal....

Dallasluver19 14

Monday 9 April 2012 1:40

I guess when u have sex, the girl will have to lay down to 'get you'. XD

Anorien 0

Monday 9 April 2012 5:09

...Frodo?

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The Top

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You deserved it 2 929

Today, and for the last few days, I’ve been playing farming life simulator games. It dawned on me that my fictional farmers will probably be more successful and social and rich and energetic than I ever will be in my entire life. FML

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You deserved it 247

Today, while I was in bed, my cat licked my nipple. It turned me on. FML

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Today, someone screwed up the roller door at work, so I had to fix it. After doing so and leaving work late, I get home to find out my dog of 14 years had to be put down. If the door didn't need fixing, I would've been able to say goodbye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 361

You deserved it 69

Today, my friend was pulled over and told to get out of the car. The officer motioned for me to get out of the car too so I reached behind me to get my shoes. He then pointed his gun at my face and frantically asked my friend if I had a gun. My friend calmly replied "No, but shoot him anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 93

Today, I realized when I'm on my phone, I tend to play with my penis, even in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 418

You deserved it 28 751