Love: Today, I finally got my first kiss. I was so excited, I pissed...

By PissyPants - 20/06/2010 05:12 - United States

Today, I finally got my first kiss. I was so excited, I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 232

You deserved it 29 363

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Same thing different taste

By RitaDahhlinnnng - 25/08/2009 23:56 - United States

Today, I had my first real date with my first serious boyfriend. I was nervous because from past experience. I learned my lips were a bit ticklish and I usually giggled a bit during kissing. Well, we started making out and I thought was I doing pretty good hiding my laughs. Until I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 023

You deserved it 10 834

Sprinkler

By shelly - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house and had to pee. I waited an hour for my boyfriend to come home. When I saw him pull into the driveway, I peed myself in excitement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 986

You deserved it 7 589

By hollysofly - 15/01/2011 07:38 - United States

Today, I went on the first date of my life. I also burped during my first kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 199

You deserved it 7 964

By Killme - 13/07/2016 02:10

Today, as a birthday present, my friends threw a surprise party for me. I was so surprised, I pissed myself in front of everyone, including my crush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 161

You deserved it 2 129

By Anonymous - 16/06/2009 07:03 - United States

Today, my toddler peed in his potty for the first time. He was so excited to show me that he flung the pot in the air dousing my face with his piss. Then he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 557

You deserved it 5 218

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 709

You deserved it 9 541

By alf - 27/10/2008 02:34 - France

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 904

You deserved it 7 264

A real ******

By never again - 30/11/2019 01:00 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I like, but I had to pee really bad. It got really wet down there, and he thought I squirted. I peed everywhere. I let him believe he made me squirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 405

You deserved it 765

By ac-hoo - 04/02/2012 14:52 - India

Today, the man of my dreams kissed me. It was everything I had imagined it would be until in the middle of the kiss, he burped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 751

You deserved it 3 853

By Anonymous - 20/11/2010 15:46 - United States

Today, I took my driver's test. I was so nervous that I peed my pants halfway through the exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 176

You deserved it 17 269

tencentsakiss 19

Sunday 20 June 2010 12:14

Puppys also piss when excited. Are you sure you aren't really a puppy? Bad dog! Get off the Internet.

superbadd 0

Sunday 20 June 2010 13:06

mah first kiss went a little this *muah* then piss *ssss* *ssss* then piss :D

Comments

mrmystery96 0

Monday 21 June 2010 5:36

actually, and I am In no way agreeing with the potheads, plants do have sexual anatomical structures. the male being the stamen, and the female the pistil. however, more often than not, just about any plant will have both.

mrmystery96 0

Monday 21 June 2010 5:37

my comment was aimed at 132. once again, I am in no way agreeing with the potheads.

DaylightDiesInNJ 0

Monday 21 June 2010 5:53

Hey could be worse. My first kiss was on a school bus and the poor girl bashed her head against the window after the driver hit a pothole...needed 2 stitches. She was happy at least.

EdailEcstacy 0

Monday 21 June 2010 6:08

Dude, does it really matter if i call it an ipod touch or an itouch. If you knew what I meant by it, then there was really no need for that (unnecessary) correction. Thanks(:

Charmedgrass37 0

Monday 21 June 2010 6:12

lol at 22! I love The Lonely island and yah that's so sad :( really....how old r u????

Laurenlesley 0

Monday 21 June 2010 6:23

who cares? why are you posting your whole life story on FML?

HawaiianHottie 0

Monday 21 June 2010 6:40

132- sorry I'm gna sound nerdy... but technically plants do have sexes... that's how pollination happens... male plants don't pollenate... the plants look the same but have different parts within them... google it and you'll see I'm right :)