Kids: Kids say the funniest things

Kids say the funniest things

By embarrassedmom - 18/05/2009 01:19 - United States

Today, my 6 year-old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair whose leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?" He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 588

You deserved it 25 983

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Same thing different taste

Stranger danger

By anniethemoth - 15/07/2022 16:00

Today, my five-year-old daughter is absolutely miserable and constantly putting herself down, as she has been for a week. What happened a week ago? She bumped into a stranger at Walmart, apologized, and the guy told her, “Nope, not good enough. You need to die.” Who says that to a child? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 463

You deserved it 129

Quiet

By Anonymous - 07/08/2011 01:40 - United States

Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year-old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 683

You deserved it 11 523

Awkward silence

By kayin - 10/12/2010 01:59 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a tour for parents who wanted to send their kids to our school. One of the parents had a kid on crutches with what appeared to be a broken leg, so I asked him how he broke it. He replied, "I was born like this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 487

You deserved it 6 603

By me - 06/05/2013 00:56 - United States - Floresville

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 573

You deserved it 6 969

By Notpunny - 18/04/2016 22:58 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, while making small talk with a veteran, I made the mistake of using the phrase "Cost an arm and a leg". He was a double amputee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 204

You deserved it 7 874

By boyo - 21/05/2009 09:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was visiting my sick grandmother in the hospital when my cousin and I were playing in some empty wheelchairs. After goofing off I said, "They're fun, but I would kill myself if I was in a wheelchair." A little boy rounded the corner and said, "Tell me about it." He was in a wheelchair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 321

You deserved it 82 098

By Anonymous - 20/08/2019 00:01

Today, my daughter asked me to join the Army so that she wouldn't have to see me anymore. She's four. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 803

You deserved it 250

By Faker - 16/10/2012 21:44 - United States

Today, while shopping, an old man came up to me and told me I should be ashamed for walking around fake limping, and that it's horrible to mock people who actually limp from serious injuries. I wasn't faking, I was born without my right leg and I was getting used to my new prosthetic one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 044

You deserved it 1 670

By Foot In Mouth - 05/02/2009 22:56 - United States

Today, my anatomy teacher was putting together a skeleton model for class. He had misplaced the leg bone, so I thoughtfully asked, "What's the matter, lose a leg?" Unfortunately, there's nothing thoughtful about asking that question to a guy with an amputated leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 228

You deserved it 36 480

Toxic masculinity

By Anonymous - 21/04/2022 18:00

Today, my great-grandfather had his arm blown off in the army and used the splintered bone to stab an enemy soldier, and got a goddamn medal for it, and yet I just watched my grown-ass son squealing like a bitch for over 10 minutes because he got a splinter in his toe. How far we’ve fallen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 1 071

jeck_fml 0

Monday 18 May 2009 9:50

you should have have taught you're daughter some common coutesy by now

mehwhateverr 0

Monday 18 May 2009 9:57

That is so messed up. Poor guy. FHL.

Comments

Aryss 0

Monday 18 May 2009 12:07

#93 If criticism from a 6 year old is enough to tempt you to violence, perhaps you aren't standing on the most solid of ideological ground?

greatnt249 0

Monday 18 May 2009 12:11

"Did I ever say that I think the Iraqi army is strong enough to fight for themselves? Thank you for putting words into my mouth. " I think you need to reread what I said. "I'm sure the two of you have served time there like I have (37 months total) but I guess I have no clue huh." I thank you for serving my country, but I can think of many more countries that would be better served by our intervention than Iraq. That being said, that's the inherent problem (and danger) of being the world's police; we don't have the resources to help EVERYONE that needs help.

greatnt249 0

Monday 18 May 2009 12:18

"I did not 'major' in anything, I have a degree in history from a prestigious English university. I feel that my 'generally poor understanding of history' is far superior to your understanding of anything." 1. I suggest you state your case by not committing argumentum ad verecundiam. 2. Studying the War of the Roses does not an expert on Vietnam make.