Miscellaneous: Home sweet home

Home sweet home

By Deadcat101 - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa, and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 357

You deserved it 1 999

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/05/2014 16:05 - United States - New York

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 873

You deserved it 4 385

By sucks_brah - 25/12/2009 07:25 - United States

Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 309

You deserved it 2 519

Get out

By Anonymous - 10/08/2014 17:24 - Germany - Würzburg

Today, my mother kicked me out of the house because her new boyfriend needs my room. Evidently he also needs my credit card, passport, and wallet too, because she kept all three, while tossing everything else out on the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 263

You deserved it 3 246

By FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 706

You deserved it 128

Denial

By Anonymous - 04/03/2014 04:12 - United States - Woodland

Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 189

You deserved it 3 220

By myself - 30/01/2012 05:24 - Canada

Today, I came home to the nanny passed out on the couch from too much alcohol, my 2-year-old alone and locked in the bathroom, and my house in a complete wreck. To top it off, it's the day my mother-in-law, who hates me, is coming to visit from New York. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 378

You deserved it 3 963

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 20:00

Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 465

You deserved it 233

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 22:24 - Canada - Sackville

Today, my crazy drug-addict mother kicked me out of the house after siding with my crazy, drug-addict aunt, who'd just threatened to slit my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 115

You deserved it 2 020

By thatguy - 25/06/2011 07:47 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 768

You deserved it 2 991

By anonymous - 07/02/2012 09:27 - United States

Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 301

You deserved it 2 353

maliki32 7

Wednesday 11 July 2012 9:13

I feel so sorry for you, OP. Nobody should ever have to go through any of that!

GothicAngel17 24

Wednesday 11 July 2012 9:25

Stupid woman, vibrators are expensive! (For those who are retarded, it's a damn joke)

Comments

Irishgypsy 2

Wednesday 11 July 2012 13:38

Did she piss on your cat as well??

parshal 2

Wednesday 11 July 2012 13:39

Eww u dont deserve a mother like tht

laden_swallow09 34

Wednesday 11 July 2012 13:56

It's "caught", every time. No such word as "catched".

AgaveLoco 5

Wednesday 11 July 2012 14:07

Maybe she wants a bigger vibrator

chupachup_fml 0

Wednesday 11 July 2012 15:11

her little boyfriend doesn't satisfy her enough -.- corrupted world

MexicanGinger 5

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:25

BURN!!!!! xD

momo1972 3

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:28

She's a keeper!!!! Lol

jim_bolicious 4

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:50

Another example of why weed is better than booze

CamberwellCarrot 8

Wednesday 11 July 2012 16:50

Do you live in the Sunnyvale Trailer Park by any chance?

Nbrandwine 7

Wednesday 11 July 2012 17:24

One word. Rehab

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Today, at my work at a designer clothing store, we received a list of photos from the police of known shoplifters. My coworkers were looking at the list saying "Eugh, look at that one: you'd shoplift with a face like that". I walked over and saw that they were looking at a photo of my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 621

You deserved it 6 402

Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 302

You deserved it 252

Today, I wanted to spend some time with my daughter, since I work all the time and hardly ever get time off. She wanted to play Minecraft, so played it with her. Have you ever been killed over and over in a video game by an 8 year-old? I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 306

Today, my friend canceled plans the day before the event, after planning to go together for over a month. He said he needed to work, which would be understandable, if his only job wasn’t for Uber where he literally sets his own hours. It’s too late to find another friend to go with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 722

You deserved it 115

Today, my best friend got engaged. I would be happy for her, if it wasn’t for the fact that her fiancé was my boyfriend just 2 months ago. Upon hearing the news, I severed all ties with her. She ended up bitching me out and calling me selfish for being upset. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 543

You deserved it 133

Today, I found out that while I was in the ICU for having had a life-threatening seizure, my boyfriend was out partying with other girls. His excuse was that he needed to find a new girl if I died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 176

You deserved it 316

Home sweet home

Same thing different taste

Get out

Denial

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