Don't Touch My Fries By FML Approved - 22/10/2017 04:00 These aren't beetles... This is Sparta! I agree, your life sucks 472 You deserved it 124 Share Tweet Share
Today, being jobless and all, I tried calling my dad for a job after my many years of pride. He invited me to an interview to compete against 10 people, probably more qualified than I am. FML I agree, your life sucks 17 090 You deserved it 7 231
Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML I agree, your life sucks 34 958 You deserved it 30 183
Today, my boyfriend grabbed my boob, shook it savagely, and shouted "Earthquake!" FML I agree, your life sucks 36 062 You deserved it 8 688
Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML I agree, your life sucks 75 216 You deserved it 3 771
Today, a mother wrote me a $130 check for babysitting her four kids for a few hours. Trying to be gracious, I said, "Wow, thank you, this is very generous!" She thought for a minute, then said, "You're right." She took the check back, ripped it up, and wrote me a new one for $55. FML I agree, your life sucks 82 103 You deserved it 30 755
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 696 You deserved it 2 170