Miscellaneous Bad boys bad boys

Bad boys bad boys

Tom - 17/08/2011 18:27 - United States

Today, I went to court expecting to walk out a free man. Turns out my misdemeanor offense couldn't compare to the crime I committed when I walked into the court house with a switchblade tucked into my shoe. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

lalala - 14/06/2011 10:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was arrested for carrying a dangerous weapon. I was on my way home from the shop where I'd bought a new kitchen knife. FML

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Slammer

Anonymous - 04/05/2013 01:14 - Netherlands

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

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One law for thee…

Ryan - 14/07/2022 14:00

Today, I found out the off-duty cop who beat my face in front of a dozen witnesses was wasn’t even charged with assault. I have court in two weeks. FML

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Matthew - 27/11/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML

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Paperwork and bureaucracy

Anonymous - 04/02/2023 04:00 - United States

Today, I went to court because I got a traffic ticket for running a red light. While I was in court, I found out it was actually for a car I had sold years ago. FML

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Nice try

haus - 19/01/2010 19:38 - United States

Today, I had to go to court to see whether my driver's license is suspended for an entire year. I woke up early, went to court, and everything went perfectly, with all the charges being dropped. Unfortunately, I then woke up, and am now going to be late. FML

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Armed and not dangerous

littledonny - 12/05/2017 18:00

Today, I went to school wearing the same jacket I had gone hiking in the previous day. When I found out that I had left my 2" pocket knife in the pocket I immediately turned it in to the front office. They promptly had me arrested for bringing a weapon on campus. FML

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apav - 11/06/2009 11:52 - Australia

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

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Crimefighters

Anonymous - 03/07/2009 19:56 - Canada

Today, I was at the park with a friend when I said, "Gotta go, sorry. I've got court in an hour." The lady on the bench next to us then loudly complained how disgusting I was for being a criminal and threw her bird seed at me, dirtying my suit. I'm a lawyer with a case in an hour, not a criminal. FML

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CWoah - 14/09/2009 15:17 - Canada

Today, it was my court date for a car accident I was involved in back in July. I had spent months preparing a case to prove my innocence. I was scheduled to appear at 10:00 this morning. I woke up at 10:15AM. FML

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twinny_sc 13

Thursday 18 August 2011 0:17

You, sir, are a **** up.

jerome1995 4

Thursday 18 August 2011 0:14

Smooth.

Karmarocks946 9

Thursday 8 December 2016 22:48

Ydi. Wtf were you thinking

lucasjames22 8

Sunday 16 July 2017 0:03

you are a complete idiot.

kevingirl 6

Friday 29 September 2017 20:36

Are you a complete idiot? what did you think was going to happen?

kevinsagirl2323 8

Monday 23 October 2017 6:55

could you possibly be any stupider?

kevinsagirl2323 8

Sunday 29 October 2017 20:16

I cannot even wrap my head around how you could be so stupid.

sharond23 10

Tuesday 13 February 2018 22:15

are you like the stupidest person in the world?

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my boyfriend brought me a bunny for a house present for moving into our first house. She escaped her cage and bit through the electrical wires, cutting out all our power and electrocuting and killing herself. FML

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Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

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Today, I went to a music festival in an area where the weather is practically sunny all year round, but for this special occasion it rained the whole time, turning the venue into a giant mud pit. FML

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Today, my boyfriend's mom is talking shit about me to anyone who will listen, all because I refused to stay at her house and help her with a few chores she said she would pay me for. She keeps leaving out the part where I saw dozens of bed bugs not even 5 minutes after I got there. FML

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Today, I had a stomach bug and had to run to the restroom because I messed my pants. My boyfriend's words of comfort? "Don't worry, bro. I've crapped my pants at least twice since we've been together." FML

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Today, I unexpectedly ran into my boss. Last week, I'd met with him every day, putting together a last-minute presentation of my research for him to deliver at conference overseas. It turns out that his passport had expired. FML

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