Money

Karma karma karma karma chameleon, you come and go.

By Karma - 15/03/2017 02:00

Today, I forgot my phone in a restaurant bathroom because I was too distracted trying to steal three rolls of toilet paper without anyone noticing. After sinking that low because I was too broke to buy my own toilet roll, I'm now also in the market for a new phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 682

You deserved it 7 248

By Anonymous - 14/03/2017 10:06

Today, I found out my roommate is literally crazy. I talked to his sister for an hour on the phone, she told me I should move out as soon as possible and to make sure I take everything I brought, because he's a thief and a liar. She was amazed I had stayed as long as I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 433

You deserved it 745

jasonrellet tells us more.

jasonrellet 22

Tuesday 14 March 2017 4:15

So I know he was wacko but what I didn't know was that he was confirmed Insane by a psychiatrist. She knew and told me a lot about him, when I told him I was moving out at the end of that month he threatened to kick me out and dump my stuff in the street, he also kept my entire deposit. I later found out that the money I payed him to rent the room was used to go to bars and buy his beer. After that month the electricity and gas and water would have been shut off.

By BleakExpectations - 12/03/2017 16:00

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years revealed he'd got me a complete collection of Charles Dickens' novels for £3 from a charity shop. He was particularly proud as he said it meant he could give me one for Christmas and my birthday each year, thus avoiding having to buy me presents for the next 15+ years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 961

You deserved it 616

Scammed

By 96Ellie - 11/03/2017 14:00

Today, I finally got a product I ordered two weeks ago as a free trial-only pay shipping deal. Also today, the same company took an extra $130 out of my account without authorisation. Best part: when I called to sort things out, they told me they had no record of my order details. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 085

You deserved it 649

Kinda sus

By Anonymous - 08/03/2017 09:00 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, the new security guard of my apartment building tackled me for "suspicious behavior" while I was taking a bag full of dirty kitty litter to the trash chute. He broke my arm and cause the trash bag to explode. When I got back from the hospital, I was fined for littering in the hallway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 952

You deserved it 309

By MikaPika - 07/03/2017 20:00 - Sweden - G?teborg

Today, my boss offered me a 3% "raise" with new commission targets. Consequently this "raise" would result in my income being reduced by a third. Apparently, if I can reach my current targets, they're too easy. So, as a reward for being great at my job, I get a reduced salary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 943

You deserved it 373

'Cause I'm a Criminal

By Anonymous - 05/03/2017 14:00

Today, I woke up to find both of my bank accounts frozen. My bank informed me that the IRS had ordered a freeze on my assets because of back taxes owed, and would not unfreeze them until the money is paid. The amount? $2.47. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 233

You deserved it 925

By Justus Buhler - 03/03/2017 02:00

Today, my girlfriend told me that she had to go to New Hampshire for a few days for her grandma's funeral. Later I found out she spent over $1,000 dollars (on our joint account) to take a vacation with the man she was cheating on me with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 510

You deserved it 724

Exterminators are expensive

By vinyl_mermaid - 02/03/2017 14:00

Today, in an effort to rearrange my bedroom, I planned to reroute my internet cables under my house. Then I found out about the black widow infestation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 633

You deserved it 490

By Stargirl - 28/02/2017 07:00 - United States - Modesto

Today, in an attempt to support and encourage my efforts in getting a new job, my boyfriend said, "Imagine having triple what's in your bank account right now!" Triple what's in my bank account right now would be exactly $38.94. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 050

You deserved it 756

Cost of living crisis

By hiddenplainly - 24/02/2017 10:00 - United States

Today, I did my budget. I have a good job, make decent money, and work full time, but without including any flexible spending items like groceries, I make $32 less than my bills each month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 317

You deserved it 1 247

Sue! SUE!

By homelessagain - 18/02/2017 06:00 - United States - Lorain

Today, I found out, through Facebook, that my landlord hadn't been paying the mortgage on the house I'm renting from him. It's going into foreclosure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 805

You deserved it 435

#winning

By Anonymous - 17/02/2017 06:00 - United States - Lakeville

Today, I placed $20 in a slot machine at a casino and in a matter of 5 minutes lost it all. My sister then sat at the same machine, put her $20 in and quadrupled her money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 183

You deserved it 2 043

Spooked

By Anonymous - 16/02/2017 14:00 - United States

Today, immediately after placing my order and paying for my meal, the Chinese takeout place lost all power. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 664

You deserved it 447

The first step to solving a problem is admitting you have one!

By zarko - 14/02/2017 14:00 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I created myself a Dropbox folder named "Traffic fines". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 312

You deserved it 5 680

By Savy - 13/02/2017 12:00 - United States - Mesa

Today, I was tailgated by a car with his high beams on for an hour. Any time I changed my speed or lane, he would do the same. I finally managed to get away from him because a cop pulled me over and gave me a speeding ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 150

You deserved it 922

By Anonymous - 12/02/2017 09:00 - United States - Fall City

Today, two days before a big weight lifting competition with a $3,000 grand prize, I broke my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 578

You deserved it 706

By Dave - 07/02/2017 06:00 - United States

Today, a vendor contacted me to let me know that our contract renewal went through. Turns out, I misread our original contract and now I've obligated our company to buy $24k of services, when my boss wanted to cancel it. It's only February and I already know I'm not getting a bonus this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 050

You deserved it 2 611

He Tried?

By Liz - 06/02/2017 16:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I told my soon-to-be-ex that he never does anything for the kids, and hasn't contributed a dime. He showed up with a half a gallon of milk and a box of cereal. Not what I meant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 862

You deserved it 791

Locked in

By Ugh - 02/02/2017 16:00 - United States - Washington

Today, I locked myself out of my apartment. I've just realized that I could have spent $30 on an Uber or Lyft to my parents' place to grab the other set of keys instead of calling a locksmith and paying $280 for him to drill a hole through my doorknob, rendering all my keys useless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 209

You deserved it 4 404

By thesaddestsoup - 02/02/2017 20:00 - Macedonia - Stip

Today, my long-distance relationship ended. The only thing my dad had to say to comfort me was that he hopes my phone bills will, "go back to normal now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 608

You deserved it 1 369

By Anonymous - 31/01/2017 20:00 - United States - Jackson

Today, a woman came into my life and took all I had left in the world. The woman was my hair stylist. She took my hair and the last of my money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 847

You deserved it 1 756

Staycation time

By Anonymous - 30/01/2017 13:05 - United Kingdom

Today, £250 of money belonging to work was stolen from my handbag. My boss says I have to pay it back because I'm the one that signed out the cash. There goes the holiday I was about to book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 347

You deserved it 1 048

By Anonymous - 25/01/2017 16:00

Today, after months of delays, my home renovation is nearing completion. Well, it was nearing completion. Last night, a pipe burst, flooding the entire house. The water damage will cost more to repair than the entire renovation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 362

You deserved it 237

Thanks a lot!

By dk14 - 24/01/2017 10:00

Today, my girlfriend's dad let me borrow his car for transportation to work because mine got totaled. This car is a complete dump and I've realized he's only letting me use it so it's my fault to fix the broken things on the car. So far, I've had to replace the battery and two popped tires. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 061

You deserved it 671

Pennies on the dollar

By pizzalady - 22/01/2017 20:00

Today, while delivering pizza I was yet again given $0.04 over the total bill and told condescendingly to "keep the change." This happens on every shift. My pay is reduced during deliveries, and I drive my own car, and use my own gas. For $0.04. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 118

You deserved it 820

Spirit world

By Anonymous - 21/01/2017 10:00

Today, I got another in a year-long string of threatening letters about my late mother's credit card bill. I've called the credit company repeatedly to settle the account, but they won't talk to me because I'm not authorized to access it. Hope they have a Ouija board. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 024

You deserved it 499

By Maleficia - 19/01/2017 08:25

Today, the government froze my bank account for not paying college debt, and now I can't access my 0.30 cents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 920

You deserved it 1 506

Shop til you drop

By Anonymous - 15/01/2017 08:00

Today, after getting home from shopping, I noticed a security tag was still on one of the shirts I bought. I decided to take it back and ask them to remove the tag. They then accused me of trying to steal (even after I showed them the receipt) and kicked me out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 187

You deserved it 594

By Anonymous - 13/01/2017 16:38

Today, I went to Walmart with all my birthday money, which I had in a wallet with my permit and everything else. I was sat on a bench looking for items for my iPod Touch However… I left my wallet behind. Turns out an old couple stole it. I got my shit jacked by grandparents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 422

You deserved it 2 515

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The Top

Today, after another failed relationship, I started thinking about role models for what I could do better next time. After going through every relationship and marriage among my family and friends, I realized that almost all either already ended or are worse than the one I just left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 100

Today, as always, my mom slams every door she closes. I faint when I hear loud sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 198

Today, at school, we were supposed to say something that we are thankful for. When I was about to speak, one of the girls at my table said, "It's okay, you can say PornHub." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 331

You deserved it 1 228

Today, I visited my family for spring break because I've been away at college and I haven't seen them since Christmas. Almost as soon as I walked in the door, my mom had me clean the living room area, clean up cat vomit, and do the dishes. Thanks guys... I missed you too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 655

You deserved it 3 115

Today, while working at my desk alone and with my headphones in, I suddenly let loose a loud stream of gas. As I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, I saw, in the reflection of my laptop, that my roommate had been sitting silently on the couch right behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 443

You deserved it 4 503

Today, a girl said to me, "Sorry, but I have a boyfriend". I hadn't said anything to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 931

You deserved it 3 233