Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help...

By shocked - 25/08/2011 18:10 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 786

You deserved it 5 130

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Same thing different taste

Are you experienced?

By Brax - 30/05/2012 09:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 285

You deserved it 9 431

By imy - 18/10/2011 15:01 - United States

Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 166

You deserved it 9 476

YDI Fosho

By shuffling man - 12/08/2018 01:30

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to try anal, praise the lord hallelujah. As we were getting into position, she let out a rancid fart she'd been saving for my face. Apparently it was revenge for me seeing Mamma Mia 2 without her while she was at work yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 425

You deserved it 4 082

By Soline - 08/12/2008 12:05 - France

Today, I wanted to wake up my sweetheart with a surprise blowjob. He surprised me as well with a knee to the stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 259

You deserved it 9 058

Stuff

By BOO! - 25/05/2019 04:00

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head. When I came, she was scared of the "stuff" that came out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 260

You deserved it 413

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 633

You deserved it 91 094

Mixed emotions

By Glen - 26/02/2025 04:30 - India - Ooty

Today, my girlfriend of 5 months walked in on me naked while I was on the toilet. She proceeded to tell me that she wants to watch me taking a dump. I'm both shocked and too hard to do what she told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 157

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 00:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 388

You deserved it 4 415

By instinct - 12/06/2013 03:06 - Australia - Doncaster East

Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 844

You deserved it 78 310

Horny devil

By jimboxo - 26/04/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, my fiancée got out of the shower, completely shaved. I went over to her, wrapped her in a hug and asked her what the occasion was. She pulled away and said that she had a gyno appointment. My fiancée will clean up for the gyno, but not for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 728

You deserved it 10 965

deviable 9

Friday 26 August 2011 2:00

Bow chika bow wow.

9987coldplayfan 1

Friday 26 August 2011 2:06

Did you return the favor?

Comments

PapSmearNinja 4

Friday 26 August 2011 9:09

haha surprise!!

Jessa_Bo_Bessa 0

Friday 26 August 2011 9:27

She must read Cosmo...

TorontoChik 0

Friday 26 August 2011 12:04

Lol I was thinking of the same fml haha

Nikki0228 10

Friday 26 August 2011 10:31

My, how.. Nice of her.. x_x

leannecloveryau 11

Friday 26 August 2011 11:08

nice of her, i guess....

TorontoChik 0

Friday 26 August 2011 12:03

This is the second fml regarding "inserting" and the "derrière" today..heh..funny..

fricknugget 3

Friday 26 August 2011 13:56

cosmo?

PeaceOutx24 0

Friday 26 August 2011 16:24

Wasn't there an fml above this one that was basically the same thing from a girls point of view? Hmmm.. Suspicious

capnbzarr 43

Friday 26 August 2011 18:18

That's rape.

sjbdtz 1

Friday 26 August 2011 19:14

Notice you said halfway thru. So it didn't stop you.

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 26 August 2011 20:00

You failed to mention that the surprise was her x-boyfriend "Tank" who just got out of prison and missed "Pushing your shit in". I suspect the rectal exam wont be a big deal any more. In fact, instead of doing a colonoscopy, you're probably ok to just ram a Nikon with a telescopic lens up your ass.