The Top

OP here, Firstly, thanks to everyone who has been comforting me about this. I was pretty upset and distraught when it happened (my whole job being to save and protect people), but now I see it as a learning curve. To answer tour questions/comments; 1) Yes, the centre manager has (finally) granted us a bigger budget for maintenance and we will be replacing all doors within the week. 2) the little girl is A-okay. There were no signs of bruising, swelling, laceration/graze, break, strain, sprain or anything else. I think she was more scared than anything else, but she was dancing around about 5 minutes after I gave her an ice pack, so that's a plus. 3) Yes, everything in Australia tries to kill us. Except volcanoes. We don't have a single active one (and we're the only continent to be able to say that!!!). Again, thanks to everyone for your support. I love my job and I was so scared I was going to lose it, and so worried that I had done this little girl harm. Apparently she just sees it as a cool story to tell at school (her aunt told us this when we made the follow-up phone call).

Bridezilla

By Anonymous - 08/07/2022 00:00

Today, my fiancée is a Marvel fan, and insists her wedding ring be made of Palladium, the stuff that powers Iron Man’s heart. A ring in the style she wants costs almost £1000 and we are not wealthy, the budget for the entire wedding is only £4000, but she insists or she won’t marry me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 821

You deserved it 383

By Anonymous - 05/01/2018 19:00

Today, I got my period during my dance solo. My costume was white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 610

You deserved it 427

By Anonymous - 19/04/2018 01:30

Today, at work, a customer ordered a caramel latte with no caramel. I made a regular latte after explaining that’s what it was. He got angry and threw it at me. I got fired for insulting his intelligence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 013

You deserved it 309

The geyser

By Anonymous - 15/05/2020 23:00

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 153

You deserved it 418

She's got it going on!

By Heartbroken - 08/08/2018 13:00 - United States

Today, my best friend told me he had a crush on someone in my house. I got excited, but he told me it was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 478

You deserved it 244

Dumbass

By whyyyy - 17/06/2020 05:05

Today, my daughter shaved her head in solidarity for a friend who went bald from cancer. Normally this would be an amazing gesture. Unfortunately, her “friend” is a fictional character from a book she’s reading. My daughter had almost 24-inch long hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 100

You deserved it 550

By avertle - 18/10/2018 20:30

Today, I got home from a long, stressful day at class to hear my grandma screaming from inside the barn. I quickly dropped all my things and ran in to see what was going on. Did something fall on her? Was there an animal attacking the horses? No. A pigeon had gotten into the barn. I had to chase it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 239

You deserved it 310

avertle tells us more.

avertle 9

Tuesday 16 October 2018 20:04

OP here. I probably should’ve clarified this- she is not afraid of birds. The barn always has pigeons in it. She wasn’t afraid of the pigeon. The pigeon had gotten into a separate part of the barn that it isn’t supposed to be in. She was trying to get it out and decided the best way to do that was scream like a banshee until it left, which only made problems worse.