Work and Relatable: USA! **** YEAH! - FML

USA! **** YEAH!

By dinkley7 - 20/03/2021 21:30

Today, at work, I had to tell someone to put out a cigarette. He yelled at me saying it’s a free country. I work at a gas station. FML

agreeclassic 1 092

vote type 1 72

New Year, New Blunders
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I just work here, dude

By TVKill3r - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, at work while near a cigarette tray outside, a man said, "Thanks for polluting our environment!" All I could say was, "What?" He then said, "I'm speaking English you know!" I was cleaning the cigarette tray at the time, don't smoke at all, and was born here. FML

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Shoutout to all retail workers

By Anonymous - 15/03/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, it's my last week working at a gas station. A fat middle-aged man threw a hissy over the price of 2-liter Coke and demanded I change it. I asked him to leave; he wouldn't, and forced me to call the cops. He stormed out as I was on the phone, pointed at me, and called me a "weak piece of shit". Three more days… FML

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Unreasonable

By Dano - 07/08/2021 10:01

Today, I was fired from my job for not buying a pack of cigarettes for my boss. I only lasted two months in that junkyard. FML

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By Confused - 23/03/2012 15:34 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML

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Disgruntled

By Anonymous - 30/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, I work at a gas station. There's a bald manlet, who we fired because he couldn't do his job, who has been ripping us off by giving away tickets he wins from the slot machines. We banned him from the store. I caught him on the corner, wearing our uniform, with a sign falsely advertising that our coffee is free. FML

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By WellFineThen - 17/04/2017 05:00 - United States - Cedar Falls

Today, at work, a woman screamed at me and called me a bitch because I refused to refund something we give away for free. FML

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Knock yourself out, dude

By pornstorebitch - 23/10/2019 00:01

Today, I got told I was a bitch because I wouldn’t let a homeless man dig through my dumpster at work, even though he was hungry. We don’t even sell food. I work at a sex store. FML

agreeclassic 1 789

vote type 1 219

It's not what you think

By youmindyourownbusiness - 15/02/2013 05:53 - United States - Genoa

Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML

agreeclassic 38 553

vote type 1 4 195

When nature calls

By Sacha - 19/01/2021 08:01 - Canada

Today, while I was working in a grocery store, a costumer decide to take a dump on the ground after I told him he couldn’t access to restrooms because my boss closed them due to COVID restrictions. FML

agreeclassic 1 007

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Get back here

By Anonyme - 30/08/2013 10:59 - France - Ivry-sur-seine

Today, a man in a hurry asked me for a light. Not being able to find my lighter amongst the muddle inside my handbag, I handed him my lit cigarette so he could light his. He took it from me, started smoking it and walked off. FML

agreeclassic 25 149

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

Amanda Beltran 2

Sunday 21 March 2021 20:44

Dude. I work at a gas station. All of a sudden a customer and the pump caught fire. that was over 3 yrs ago. I still have a hard time pumping gas. I yell and cuss at everyone I see smoking at the pump. I

Jesse Duff 15

Sunday 21 March 2021 1:05

blow torches are free, and instant cremation is a bonus

Comments

Jesse Duff 15

Sunday 21 March 2021 1:05

blow torches are free, and instant cremation is a bonus

ojoRojo 27

Sunday 21 March 2021 14:13

Duck and cover

Amanda Beltran 2

Sunday 21 March 2021 20:44

Dude. I work at a gas station. All of a sudden a customer and the pump caught fire. that was over 3 yrs ago. I still have a hard time pumping gas. I yell and cuss at everyone I see smoking at the pump. I

alex_jaguara 33

Sunday 21 March 2021 20:52

Next time douse him with a fire extinguisher. I saw that happen on video.

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Today, it's been four days since I gave my husband the news that I’m pregnant, at which point he went out to “get groceries.” He still hasn’t come back. He won’t pick up my calls or texts. In fact, he blocked me on all social media and disabled his Find My iPhone. FML

agreeclassic 1 272

vote type 1 188

Today, I found out that sorting and deleting old unnecessary emails to free up space meant reliving the most horrific memories I've ever experienced. Worse yet, I have to keep certain old messages in case these things ever come up again. FML

agreeclassic 1 146

vote type 1 133

Today, my wife started checking her email on her Blackberry while we were having sex. FML

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Today, my 14-year-old sister came into the bathroom while I was in it. When she saw me, she said sorry and left. Little did I know, she took my electric toothbrush to masturbate. FML

agreeclassic 6 879

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Today, I didn't have the courage to tell the guy who likes me that I only thought of him as a friend, so I asked my best friend to do it for me. It turns out that her way of doing this is telling him to "Fuck off" and then punching him in the face. FML

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Today, I arrived at my apartment to find the door kicked in. Inside, I found my TV, Xbox, stereo, CDs, and laptop had all been stolen. When my roommate got home, I told him about it, to which he replied, "Yeah, I left my keys inside this morning, so I kicked the door in to get them." He'd left, leaving the door kicked in. FML

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