Health: Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work...

By ouch - 08/03/2011 15:50 - United Kingdom

Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work on skin. I decided to put this new piece of information to the test. FML

agreeclassic 9 656

vote type 1 99 659

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By leprechaun23 - 23/04/2012 04:21 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I taught my friend how to use a staple gun. She taught me how to get staples out of my hand. FML

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By Anonymous - 06/07/2011 18:45 - United States

Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML

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By neveragain - 16/03/2012 05:11 - Canada

Today, I gave in and let my friend give me a makeover. She couldn't find my eyelash curler, but decided that if she used scissors lightly, it would work just the same. Needless to say, it did not work. FML

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By morningeyes - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was trying to remove a temporary tattoo my friend put on my cheek. When warm water and soap didn't work, I tried something else. Just so you know, Mr. Clean Magic Erasers do not, in fact, work by magic. Tell that to the massive chemical burn covering half my face. FML

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By wtf - 09/06/2011 15:04 - United Kingdom

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

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By Anonymous - 03/06/2012 05:50 - United States - Egg Harbor Township

Today, I had an unbearable itch on my foot that I could not make go away with my nails, so I grabbed the stapler in my drawer to scratch it with. Bad idea. FML

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By 41k312 - 01/11/2016 05:03

Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML

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By Everest - 22/11/2018 14:00

Today, I got several thumbtacks jabbed into me. Why? Because my cousin thought it would be a funny prank to superglue a bunch of thumbtacks to his nerf darts. My left forearm is still bleeding. FML

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By BadassNinja - 05/09/2009 16:22 - United States

Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by punching through a piece of old drywall karate kid-style. As it turns out, the drywall was actually a thin piece of concrete. I now have a busted hand and a girlfriend with a new story to tell all her friends. FML

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By Staples - 15/05/2010 06:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally stapled my finger to a piece of paper. It hurt, but I took it out and went to restaple it. I did it again. FML

agreeclassic 12 279

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Alleged_Cranium 7

Tuesday 8 March 2011 19:09

Since you're not using it, would you donate your brain to science? They could use it to study the null-brain.

sweet_candy_ 17

Tuesday 8 March 2011 19:08

You should have tried it on your friend.

Comments

peacelovehappine_fml 0

Tuesday 15 March 2011 17:36

WOW!!! Your an IDIOT!!!!!!!

MiSSxxuNDeRSTooD 4

Saturday 19 March 2011 6:11

I did that once too.... when I was 3.

lizliz23 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 4:41

wow ur stupid

sarz14 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 12:09

watta head

OreoLovesFez 0

Saturday 2 April 2011 17:41

YDI, juss saayin..

ItsJussAle 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 22:46

YOU ARE SO STUPID!!!!!! XD Man.. *Smh* Haven't You Ever Seen Tha Movies?!? ;)

ItsJussAle 0

Tuesday 12 April 2011 22:48

YOU ARE SO STUPID!!!!!! XD Man.. *Smh* Haven't You Ever Seen Tha Movies?!? ;)

OMGBBQ 0

Thursday 14 April 2011 21:25

Dumbass! :D Just kidding.

MrBobby_fml 7

Sunday 17 April 2011 3:18

You may be thick, but if it makes you feel better, you made me laugh! :p

lizzysoccer14 4

Thursday 21 April 2011 4:16

you are a dumbass

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Today, I was driving to a gas station because I'd noticed I was almost on empty. Literally a block away from the gas station, my car broke down in the middle of an intersection, and I had to push my car to the side of the road, only to be questioned by police for "suspicious behavior." FML

agreeclassic 895

vote type 1 208

Today, after spending months comparing the previous weather forecasts to work out the exact date, and after travelling 12000 km by plane to see the cherry blossoms in bloom in Japan, I learned that this year, they bloomed 10 days earlier than expected. And to top it off, it turns out I’m allergic. FML

agreeclassic 635

vote type 1 83

Today, my patient knocked my glasses off as I assisted him in the shower. We both looked in terror as they fell into his unflushed toilet. This patient was isolated due to a contagious infection. FML

agreeclassic 12 106

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Today, after always thinking I wasn't ugly, just fat, I've lost 30kg and it now turns out I was wrong. FML

agreeclassic 1 007

vote type 1 135

Today, my manager made everyone put up Christmas decorations around the store. As well as this, we're going to have Christmas music playing on repeat all the way through to January. It's not even September yet. FML

agreeclassic 43 466

vote type 1 3 032

Today, I was running late for my morning gym class. I grabbed a near-empty drink bottle on my way out, intending to fill it up at the gym. Mid-workout, I reached for my bottle and took a big mouthful as I headed over to fill it up. To my great surprise, it was not water but straight vodka. FML

agreeclassic 4 588

vote type 1 1 430

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