Animals: Today, my dog threw up on my bed while I was sleeping. I lost...

By good_gravy - 20/02/2012 19:39 - United States

Today, my dog threw up on my bed while I was sleeping. I lost an hour of the day washing the vomit out with a rag, and my garbage disposal jammed on whatever otherworldly things my dog ate the day before. I had to dig it out by hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 244

You deserved it 3 642

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Same thing different taste

Top of the mornin' to ya!

By Anonymous Taco Man - 03/08/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, my dog had REALLY bad diarrhea. I found that out when I woke up to find it all over my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 949

You deserved it 109

By Anonymous - 20/03/2012 11:57 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, instead of waking up to soft sunlight creeping in the window or the gentle trill of birds, I was awakened by the sound of my dog vomiting all over my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 642

You deserved it 2 852

By Anonymous - 11/10/2012 05:08 - United States - Amarillo

Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 646

You deserved it 2 920

By simple living - 29/04/2015 02:43 - United States - Austin

Today, my dog threw up on the tiled floor. I found out at 6 this morning in the dark when I slipped and fell in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 893

You deserved it 2 685

Canine alarm clock

By ManlyStallion - 21/01/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, my dog woke me up with the sound of vomiting. I immediately got up and tried to figure out what he was doing. After 30 minutes, he didn’t vomit, just kept making the sounds. I banished him from my presence for some more shuteye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 299

You deserved it 216

Night killer

By Tom - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Israel

Today, I was woken up by a funky smell. My dog had eaten a dead bird and thrown up all over my bed and floor. At 4 o'clock in the morning I had to clean up regurgitated bits of bird, feathers, blood and dog food. The smell still hasn't gone away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 830

You deserved it 3 679

By WhyMe - 27/11/2018 17:30

Today, I woke up approximately half a nanosecond after my dog involuntarily vomited in bed. On my face. I opened my mouth because it literally filled my nose. I swallowed out of reflex before I was fully awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 513

You deserved it 317

By jonboy - 09/05/2009 20:11 - United Kingdom

Today, I got a new comfy duvet and pillow and was looking forward to a good night's sleep. I got into bed and was followed by my dog, who then threw up the tub of butter he had just stolen from the kitchen onto my brand new bed spread. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 811

You deserved it 5 279

By WellThatSucks - 23/05/2016 09:15 - United States

Today, I discovered my dog pooped in my bed, under the covers, by rolling over onto it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 215

You deserved it 1 401

By Dogmom - 18/12/2018 17:30

Today, I couldn’t tell that my puppy had an upset stomach before I left for work. I came home to her covered in shit inside her crate. After cleaning her up and almost being done with the mess, my husband found where she had tried to lick herself clean and then vomited it up in our bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 286

You deserved it 288

Pentium_4 27

Tuesday 21 February 2012 1:51

man, being a dog would be quite the life. while you're cleaning up the mess they made, he/she is probably relaxing on the couch licking their privates

theWINDOWmonster 3

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:08

Why would you put it in the disposal? As opposed to something that makes more sense, like ohh.. the trash?

Comments

Pelreskovich 11

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:04

Yummy, dig that vomit out with a spoon and save yourself the dinner bill! ..no, actually don't, I gagged while writing that.

ScarletBloom 14

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:04

Man's best friend.

A100893 30

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:05

Sorry, this might seem immature, but... Yuck.

theWINDOWmonster 3

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:08

Why would you put it in the disposal? As opposed to something that makes more sense, like ohh.. the trash?

ElegantlyLovelyy 6

Tuesday 21 February 2012 3:23

I thought I was the only person thinking this like wtf? Lol the garbage bin would have done much justice to the situation

nofearjenshere 12

Tuesday 21 February 2012 5:02

And didn't OP's mother teach him never to put your hands down a garbage disposal ... Especially when reaching for dog vomit... Gross.

rubberduckie94 13

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:15

He was letting you know he prefers a different brand of dog food.

perdix 29

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:15

The otherworldly things you handled were shit and dead animal remains.

nanna_21D 1

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:18

Dude yesterday morning the same thing happened to me. My dog ate out of the trash when I wasn't around and she threw up on my bed at 6 in the morning. I tried throwing her off the bed so she can go on the floor instead of my bed. Didn't work cuz I had it on my floor and bed -__-

derkster 6

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:36

Lmao ur dog uses the garbage disposal? :p

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 21 February 2012 2:37

This is EXACTLY why I don't have a pet. Well, that and because I'm a cold-hearted ass who is completely incapable of caring for anyone or anything not named "Bastard".