Animals: Today, I was walking my dogs. I had a doggy bag, and was holding...

By doggybag - 24/09/2009 05:17 - Canada

Today, I was walking my dogs. I had a doggy bag, and was holding it closed, then breathing in it, so it would blow up. My dogs 'went', so I picked it up and kept walking. As I was heading home, I absent-mindedly started blowing into the bag again. Everything ended up in my mouth and on my face. FML

agreeclassic 12 781

vote type 1 80 966

The rhythm of the fight
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Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML

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Today, I was picking up after my dog with a poo baggie over my hand, like a mitten. Too bad the bottom ripped open and my bare hand poked through it just as I grabbed a big handful of steaming dog turd. FML

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By gera3gera - 07/10/2009 02:07 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML

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By WhyMe - 27/11/2018 17:30

Today, I woke up approximately half a nanosecond after my dog involuntarily vomited in bed. On my face. I opened my mouth because it literally filled my nose. I swallowed out of reflex before I was fully awake. FML

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By itzcorinnelove - 18/08/2009 16:11 - United States

Today, I was walking my Aunt's dog to the park and I grabbed a few doggy bags to pick up the poop. As it turns out the bag had a small unoticable hole in it, that grew bigger as I fit my hand through it. I ended up using my hand to pick up the poop and didnt realize it. FML

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By Anonymous - 09/11/2020 14:02

Today, I was out walking my dog. After he took a dump, I went to pick it up but my glasses fell right in his poop. I didn’t have tissue, just the plastic bag. FML

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By jazthefish - 12/07/2010 19:42 - United States

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Today, I tripped over my dog and landed on my face while trying to prove to my father that I can walk and chew gum at the same time. FML

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By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 15:50 - United States

Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weedwacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgetting that I am mowing where the dogs go to the restroom, I absent-mindedly weedwack over dog poop. Which got flung into my face. FML

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Anarchy_fml 0

Thursday 24 September 2009 12:12

You should have seen it coming...never develop habits like that. This will probably teach you not to...

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 24 September 2009 12:17

You just brought a whole new meaning to getting shitfaced.

Comments

MandieHart 0

Friday 25 September 2009 10:35

this is too ****** up to be real,I call it as I read it. fakeeeee.

littlegirl12_fml 0

Friday 25 September 2009 20:13

Either your the most moronic person who ever lived or a liar. I go with both. That or gravity shifted for that brief second in time and "blowing" in a bag somehow turned in to "sucking" in a bag...?