Miscellaneous: Today, I found out I can sneak out of my house... but not back...

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 12:17 - United States

Today, I found out I can sneak out of my house... but not back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 341

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Top comments

TheAbsentOne 0

Saturday 27 February 2010 15:59

Idiot. FYL.

zarahboo 0

Saturday 12 June 2010 20:24

am i the only one who noticed that the person is actually a woman but illustrated as a man? (look at the original story)

Comments

franceypants 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 3:24

that's why you double check the day before sneaking out dummy

ROBfmlROB 0

Monday 26 September 2011 2:26

This is a copy of that commericial. Fail. Be more original.

anongrl5846 19

Thursday 22 March 2012 19:09

Me 2

StormFML 7

Friday 19 April 2013 4:30

Maybe next time you should being keys or go in through the back smart one. YDI

Circles 18

Friday 16 January 2015 17:57

"You know what's a good idea, posting about this while I wait for my parents to realise I'm out here and give me a beating" -OP

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I found out that my mom had read my diary because she was worried. She now knows details about my depression, details about my sex life, such as how I lost my virginity, to whom (I don't have a boyfriend), and what condition I was in at the time (drunk as a duck). She also showed my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 417

You deserved it 22 074

Today, I tried to storm out of the room during an argument, but walked face-first into our closed sliding glass door. My boyfriend laughed so hard that he had to sit down. Later, we noticed the nose mark I left. He won't let me clean it, because he wants to show it to everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 374

You deserved it 10 798

Today, my ex-husband’s new girlfriend stopped by the pharmacy I work at, checked out at my lane, and had me ring up her condoms. She kept bragging about how she’s gonna have “nasty freaky sex” with my ex all night long while I work at a “miserable pharmacy.” I burst into tears while she laughed and waltzed away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 174

Today, my ex-girlfriend broke up with me once again after getting back together for two weeks. Just two weeks earlier, I was seeing a girl. I'd ended things with her to mend things with my ex. I hit the girl up on Facebook to ask her out. She now has a boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 1 022

Today, it was a little colder than it should be for this time of year, and as a result I was using the heater in my car. Apparently within the last four months, a mouse managed to make his way into my heater vent and die. I can not get the smell of death out of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 299

You deserved it 3 339

Today, I ordered a pizza for delivery after a long day. When the delivery guy showed up, I realized I had no cash, so I tried to pay him using my credit card. Unfortunately, I couldn’t remember the PIN, and after three failed attempts, the delivery guy just stared at me in awkward silence and said, "It’s okay, I’ll just take the pizza back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 505