Health: Today, I found out exactly what Ducolax stool softener is all...

By Username - 03/03/2010 16:34 - France

Today, I found out exactly what Ducolax stool softener is all about. Holy colon cleanse Batman! FML

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vote type 1 25 223

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By Anonymous - 24/12/2022 15:00

Today, after fasting for 24 hours and drinking 2 buckets of laxatives, my doctor's office notified me that my colonoscopy had been cancelled. I'd just finished the prep by taking the fart pills, and now have the cleanest colon ever. A lot of time spent on the toilet that I’ll never get back though. FML

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Out of the frying pan…

By Anonymous - 16/10/2025 20:00

Today, after a five day bout of severe chronic constipation, I decided to get some orange juice and increase my water intake. The good news is that I'm no longer constipated. The bad news is that I've got diarrhea now. FML.

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By sofakingweetodit - 18/10/2010 12:44 - United States

Today, in preparation for a presentation at work, I decided to take a handful of vitamins to fight my cold. As I was putting the bottles away, I noticed one of them was a laxative. FML

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By Anonymous - 18/11/2015 14:50 - Canada

Today, I read the instructions on my new prescription constipation medicine: "For best results, defecate before use." FML

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Today, after being woken up with the intense urge to go to the bathroom, and having gone to the bathroom three times in the last hour, I finally realized I took two laxatives instead of two Midol. My ass is on fire. FML

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By Rob - 16/10/2009 01:59 - France

Today, while on the crapper, I learned that morphine has a nasty side-effect. It appears that it can cause a massive rock-hard piece of dung the size of a bus to form in your intestines. I went to the doctor, he handed me a glove and some laxatives and said, "Have fun!" FML

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The Gush

By Anonymous - 10/10/2019 22:01

Today, I had planned to do a twenty-minute colon cleanse enema for weight loss. Instead, I woke up in the middle of the night with uncontrollable diarrhea that’s still going strong. Eight hours and counting. FML

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You need more fiber

By Anonymous - 30/04/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I finally got over having constipation for two days straight. It came in the form of a normal-sized, rock-hard turd that made me scream "Ow!" when it came out. FML

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By Maddie - 22/03/2011 15:39

Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML

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By jack - 27/08/2015 10:56 - United Kingdom - London

Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML

agreeclassic 27 183

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Person1233 12

Wednesday 3 March 2010 20:05

What the ****?!?

Taipan_fml 0

Wednesday 3 March 2010 20:06

I didn't know Batman used that. Huh. Learn sumthin new every day.

Comments

Critter456 0

Monday 12 April 2010 10:24

love the descriptiveness...

DakotaCat 4

Friday 24 September 2010 5:09

What? This doesn't make sence!!

skyttlz 32

Sunday 6 March 2011 8:00

no guys it's because the word relax has the word LAX in it

Treva0g 0

Thursday 10 March 2011 5:38

????????? WHAT???? Are you high or somethin????????????????????????????

anonymous31_fml 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 8:09

stop Robyn me of my dinner. TMI.

lifesabitcchh 0

Wednesday 10 August 2011 9:37

Lawlz

saxplayer9291 3

Wednesday 21 December 2011 5:38

Wtf did you think it would do???

profligatesoul 18

Tuesday 5 March 2013 3:25

It's great isn't it! :)

misterlandshark 5

Monday 27 January 2014 5:02

YDI for that pun

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