Love: Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I...

By ouchmyeye - 10/06/2011 04:59 - United States

Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I walked on my balcony only to find my boyfriend throwing rocks trying to wake me. He didn't see me and threw a rock right into my eye. FML

agreeclassic 39 717

vote type 1 5 130

The rhythm of the fight
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By Vero - 17/05/2012 15:02 - Austria - Timelkam

Today, in an attempt to be romantic, my boyfriend threw little stones against my window. Unfortunately, the window wasn't closed, and I was standing in front of it. FML

agreeclassic 27 378

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By Anonymous - 05/08/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bedroom wall outside. I could see my boyfriend's car from the window, so I assumed he was throwing pebbles to get my attention. I opened the window and an egg flew in. FML

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By Kaz - 07/05/2011 06:40 - United States

Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML

agreeclassic 12 590

vote type 1 50 312

By Jacqueline - 01/07/2012 20:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to throw pebbles at my bedroom window in the middle of the night. It triggered the burglar alarm, which woke up everyone in the house. If my parents didn't know I had a boyfriend before, they certainly do now. FML

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By anonymous - 18/12/2010 09:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

agreeclassic 39 443

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By Faaccckkk - 25/03/2013 14:48 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to whimsically serenade me by throwing rocks at my apartment window and singing. He got the wrong window. Another guy answered, and now he thinks I'm cheating on him. FML

agreeclassic 41 993

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By me - 27/10/2010 12:36 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend elbowed me in the eye while we were sleeping. His excuse: "You shouldn't have stayed over." FML

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Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 15/07/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML

agreeclassic 536

vote type 1 774

Major romcom vibes

By staciedee - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

agreeclassic 35 601

vote type 1 5 037

Rude awakening

By oww - 15/11/2009 19:38 - United States

Today, I woke up with a bloody nose and my lamp next to me in bed. Apparently I grabbed the cord of the lamp and yanked while I was sleeping, and it fell on my face. The worst part? My boyfriend saw it was going to happen, but didn't stop me because he thought it would be funny to "see my reaction." FML

agreeclassic 30 266

vote type 1 3 404

Tsunami87 17

Friday 10 June 2011 12:14

don't we use mobile phones these days?

Temi25 6

Friday 10 June 2011 12:13

at least he wants to see you

Comments

wdfcrystal 6

Friday 17 June 2011 17:47

Well it's the thought that counts.. ;x Fyl

Connorbb95 1

Wednesday 27 July 2011 22:20

I bet he did see you

MyDorkySelf 5

Tuesday 16 August 2011 17:28

Oh Romeo nice shot lol

DeViLgRiLo 1

Thursday 15 December 2011 5:39

SMOOTH!! :)

Lyraa_fml 0

Wednesday 29 February 2012 7:14

Ouch?

meb9 4

Sunday 6 May 2012 1:28

Haha that's funny!!!!

NiqueNique09 6

Wednesday 27 June 2012 6:47

Romeo and Juliet?

wtdafuq 6

Tuesday 22 October 2013 4:36

U mean stone. .not a rock! If he had thrown rocks, there'd be no window or head left to complain about!

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Today, I realized something: when other people are drunk, they dance around and make out with people. When I'm drunk, I apparently think it's a great idea to chew on electrical cords. FML

agreeclassic 19 235

vote type 1 32 331

Today, on my building site, I asked one of the guys to pass me a screwdriver. He threw it so hard that when I caught it, it stabbed into the meat of my finger and came clean out the other side. Now all the guys keep joking I got royally screwed. The jokes are worse than the pain. FML

agreeclassic 1 060

vote type 1 121

Today, I found out that when my now ex-fiance said he “needs time to think about it” when he got cold feet at our wedding, he meant he needed time to screw his hot young coworker. FML

agreeclassic 574

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Today, my wife picked a fight with a guy twice my size, then expected me to “man up and teach the bitch a lesson.” I’m not insane so I of course refused to fight, then she locked me out of the house for embarrassing her in front of her sisters. I want a frisking divorce. FML

agreeclassic 1 125

vote type 1 146

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Instead of having breakup sex, she tidied my room. She said it gave her more pleasure than any time we'd ever had sex. FML

agreeclassic 29 136

vote type 1 14 023

Today, while he was eating chicken, one of my friends asked me why I'm a vegetarian. I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals are forced to live in. He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals, they're birds." FML

agreeclassic 45 514

vote type 1 9 549

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