Health, Sex and Farts: Pros and cons

Pros and cons

By Anonymous - 27/06/2022 12:00

Today, I realised that I can't orgasm if I don't relax enough to let myself fart. FML

agreeclassic 912

vote type 1 238

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

Growing old sucks

By Anonymous - 07/04/2023 00:00

Today, I've gotten to that point in life where I can no longer seem to trust a fart. FML

agreeclassic 689

vote type 1 154

S❤️ed

By andinpublictoo - 29/10/2021 22:59

Today, and for the first time in my life, I was unable to trust a fart. FML

agreeclassic 742

vote type 1 228

By fat and alone - 05/06/2014 04:11 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I figured I needed to go on a diet when I discovered I could make farting noises with my neck. FML

agreeclassic 39 211

vote type 1 18 125

Multitasking

By Anonymous - 14/11/2012 21:28 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

agreeclassic 54 279

vote type 1 6 812

Relaxed

By Sorry, Doc - 10/09/2022 01:30

Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML

agreeclassic 984

vote type 1 230

By hiccups - 03/11/2012 15:52 - United States - New York

Today, I had my first orgasm. I also came to the realization that whenever I orgasm I get an uncontrollable case of hiccups for at least half an hour afterwards. FML

agreeclassic 33 097

vote type 1 3 705

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 08:40 - United States

Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML

agreeclassic 26 933

vote type 1 7 351

Dinnertime

By u.p.i.c. - 02/08/2019 22:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, the smell of my own fart made me feel hungry. FML

agreeclassic 1 175

vote type 1 575

By anonymous - 08/06/2011 16:47 - United States

Today, while in class, I desperately had to fart. Someone in the room had a coughing fit, so I took that as the chance to let it out. When I was about to release, the coughing stopped. I couldn't stop in time. FML

agreeclassic 20 642

vote type 1 43 530

Classic mistake

By Anonymous - 17/07/2021 15:01 - United States - Fargo

Today, I woke up from a dead sleep needing to fart. The second I tried to push it out, I realized it wasn't wasn't fart. FML

agreeclassic 830

vote type 1 489

RichardPencil 30

Monday 27 June 2022 14:58

Who was the lucky guy who helped you with that epiphany?

cacheson 41

Monday 27 June 2022 18:38

Solution: fart a whole bunch before sex

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 27 June 2022 14:58

Who was the lucky guy who helped you with that epiphany?

cacheson 41

Monday 27 June 2022 18:38

Solution: fart a whole bunch before sex

lexxiasaurus 28

Tuesday 28 June 2022 0:38

kegel exercises will help you be able to achieve ****** easier

SirEnigM0nk 22

Tuesday 28 June 2022 1:50

Let it go, let it go...I'll show myself out.

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I took a piece of toilet paper to blow my nose and had a surprise: someone in our house seems to not have understood how TP works. In this case, the principle that it shouldn't stay on the roll once there is poo on it. FML

agreeclassic 1 091

vote type 1 109

Today, the girl I've been dating asked me to describe her body. I said "Thin an toned but curvy in all the right places." I then asked her the same question to which she replied, "I don't know, you know I'm always drunk when we're together." FML

agreeclassic 31 487

vote type 1 4 629

Today, after getting out the car and closing the door, I began walking and slipped on some black ice. In the moment of panic, I grabbed onto my car wing mirror. Luckily, I didn't hit the deck. Unluckily, the wing mirror broke off. FML

agreeclassic 5 211

vote type 1 673

Today, I tried to surprise my mom and wash her car while she was away. Today, I also found out how gross our well water is. The car looks worse than before. FML

agreeclassic 2 950

vote type 1 411

Today, I learned the hard way that when a pierced, tattooed, and otherwise extremely stereotypical biker chick jokingly threatens to find you and beat you up if you don't call her back after a one-night stand, she's not actually joking. FML

agreeclassic 16 118

vote type 1 49 678

Today, I was talking to a guy I liked. He was dumped so he was ranting about how there's no good girls left. I mustered up some courage and told him I was a good girl and that I would treat him right, at which point he pretended to have an emergency phone call and abruptly left. He talked to his lock screen. FML

agreeclassic 624

vote type 1 268