Sex, Injury and Intimacy: Ouch - FML

Ouch

By anon - 14/04/2015 00:51 - United States

Spicy

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is not a screamer nor a moaner, she's a biter. My arm is getting stitches right now. FML

agreeclassic 34 539

vote type 1 3 797

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By Dontwaketheneighbors - 06/12/2012 14:24 - United States - Santee

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Right in the pecker

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Today, my girlfriend and I got into a nasty fight. After a few hours, she wanted to give me a blowjob, so I thought we weren't mad at each other anymore. Turns out she was still mad because she bit my penis. FML

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Ice cold break-up

By Ice cold - 22/11/2012 05:35 - Australia - Cheltenham

Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML

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FML: Uncensored

By Cliché... or Touché? - 03/08/2017 02:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

Lct1196 31

Tuesday 14 April 2015 14:53

For the love of God, never 69.

Zelphoric 25

Tuesday 14 April 2015 15:11

**** bitches, get stitches.

Comments

SlyCooper15 16

Tuesday 14 April 2015 22:34

You lucky dog

Pauline96_fml 20

Tuesday 14 April 2015 23:26

Try a gag. But only if she says it's okay

annalily5 28

Tuesday 14 April 2015 23:27

I was about to say "What's the problem, sounds sexy." Then I read the stitches part. Remind your girlfriend that all good things should be in moderation, and that hospital visits are not moderation.

Evil_Jester 17

Tuesday 14 April 2015 23:50

Do you taste like chicken,???

chewebb 8

Wednesday 15 April 2015 0:11

You picked a real winner.

Z3R0G5 23

Wednesday 15 April 2015 0:26

Mine is all 3. Yup. It hurts. FML

kristergirl 13

Wednesday 15 April 2015 0:46

that sounds so sexy though

trtnt25 19

Wednesday 15 April 2015 0:53

This brings back memories :P

Glcarr7 10

Wednesday 15 April 2015 4:12

That doesn't sound so bad either

cmikey 14

Wednesday 15 April 2015 4:21

Doesn't matter had sex

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