Thief and Love: One last thing…

One last thing…

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She came over to see me one last time. We hugged for minutes and cried; it was a touching moment. Just after she left, I realized my wallet that I had on the table beside us was gone. FML

agreeclassic 41 055

vote type 1 4 967

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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By MexyBoy - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 8 months and I broke up. We decided to give back everything we ever bought for each other. I gave her the stuff she bought me and when I asked for my stuff she said she'd sold it and spent the money on herself. FML

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Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML

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By Anonymous - 05/02/2021 20:00

Today, I went to see my girlfriend to talk about my anxiety, because it's been a big issue. She broke up with me instead. FML

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Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. Over text. While I was on vacation visiting my old grandparents. FML

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dahlia14 0

Monday 11 January 2010 1:09

look on the bright side, if you guys were married and divorced it would have cost you a lot more than your wallet

tyrob911 0

Monday 11 January 2010 1:11

haha your gf is still in love with your wallet lol

Comments

bumbum92 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 7:57

what a bitch. hunt her down and steal her cat.

be_mine_rr 0

Tuesday 12 January 2010 12:53

are u still feel bad about that

poundsand44 0

Wednesday 13 January 2010 4:25

keep your wallet in your pants!

luv2dance1351 0

Friday 15 January 2010 9:08

oh tat sucks

aardvarkish 16

Monday 18 January 2010 22:09

LOL, she took the most direct route...

cr1zco 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 19:09

hmmmm

samantha_durano 6

Wednesday 10 February 2010 4:49

woww, whatta *****.

Bebe123bk 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 2:26

bitchh...

omiiitsamberx3 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 3:39

tlk about ****..

Riemurasia 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 2:39

Damn, what a b*tch! Falcon Punch her in the stomache! :)

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, after 7 years of writing my PhD thesis, I found a book containing all the exact findings I've spent arduous hours, nay, years discovering. My tutoring professor somehow forgot to mention I was discovering sealing wax. FML

agreeclassic 2 055

vote type 1 703

Today, after surgery on my penis, I’m on drugs to prevent erections. My girlfriend now thinks it’s hilarious to walk around naked, bend over in front of me, and do other sexy stuff, because she knows I can’t do anything to her and it’s killing me. In three weeks, her ass is mine. FML

agreeclassic 1 168

vote type 1 247

Today, I'm so insecure that I was still slightly flattered when the demented old man at the nursing home where I work hit on me, because at least somebody finds me attractive. FML

agreeclassic 27 156

vote type 1 3 565

Today, I realized my wife named our newborn son after her ex-boyfriend. This wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't the abusive, cheating, womanizer ex that she originally described when we first met. To make things better, he was the one that eventually cut her off, not the other way around. FML

agreeclassic 656

vote type 1 116

Today, my son's teacher told me that I should take my son to the doctor, because he has been complaining of bad headaches. They ran some tests, and then removed a peanut that's apparently been lodged in his nose for months. FML

agreeclassic 36 115

vote type 1 5 245

Today, I woke up feeling awesome. I turned to face the sunrise in the window, and as I stretched and let out a big yawn. Only for my boyfriend to say "Baby, turn back over. Your breath smells like turds." FML

agreeclassic 32 829

vote type 1 10 440