Miscellaneous: No rizz

No rizz

By blackitalian - 26/11/2010 15:43 - United States

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist, and ran. FML

agreeclassic 15 163

vote type 1 31 836

The rhythm of the fight
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By Chris - 06/04/2025 22:00 - Canada

Today, I saw my ex and his new girlfriend walking towards me. To make things less awkward, I tried to be cool and give him a high five. He misjudged and went for a fist bump. I ended up slapping his hand, and it felt like it lasted forever, all while she just smirked at me. FML

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By Anon - 12/01/2012 19:24 - United States

Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML

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By antwo - 22/01/2012 04:50 - United States

Today, a cute girl was walking towards me. She held up her hand for a high five, so I also did the same. I hadn't noticed her friend behind me, and was left hanging and embarrassed. FML

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By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 16:00

Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML

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By Anonymous - 15/07/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, in a nightclub packed with people, I enthusiastically went in for a handshake with someone but they went for a fist bump. We both ended up doing the awkward “Pull back and retry” dance for a solid five seconds. I think I just lost all credibility. FML

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By epicfail - 02/08/2009 08:39 - United States

Today, I went to a local concert. The singer from my favorite band stage-dived and I got to catch him. Unfortunately I was the only one to catch him. The next thing I know I'm pinned between him and the concrete floor as he finishes whatever part of the song he was on. He was fine, I hit my head. FML

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By Great. - 18/05/2012 15:05 - United States - Billings

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML

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Slowly walking down the hall

By Rayray - 17/02/2025 12:00 - United Kingdom - Swansea

Today, I was walking down the hallway at work when I saw a coworker I hadn't talked to in a while. I went for a high-five as a friendly greeting, but she didn’t see me coming and instead awkwardly grabbed my hand like she was about to hold it. We both froze for a second, and then awkwardly sighed and practically ran away. FML

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By sociallyawkward - 19/05/2016 01:52 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I fistbumped a cashier as they tried to hand me my change. FML

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Hanging

By James - 31/07/2011 04:20 - United States

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

agreeclassic 31 412

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soccerchick02 3

Friday 26 November 2010 18:57

aaaaaaaaaaawkward

Flamehog9 0

Friday 26 November 2010 18:54

lol, fail much?

Comments

nerdsgetmehot 22

Friday 26 November 2010 20:53

Your social awkwardness pleases me. Something like this would totes magoats happen to me.

Draminicaus 0

Friday 26 November 2010 22:30

Totes Magoats? What language is your spellcheck? O_o??

nerdsgetmehot 22

Friday 26 November 2010 22:32

#83 "Totes magoats" is a reference to the movie "I Love You, Man." It simply means "totally." Paul Rudd's character utilizes the term in an instance when he's trying to make a friend and gets nervous and therefore socially awkward.

emmanizzer 6

Saturday 27 November 2010 1:43

oh god i love that movie. :) slapa da bass.

Draminicaus 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 5:36

Oooh. lol I haven't seen that movie. So, totes magoats is like what happens when I randomly scream out "Hey! Listen!" to people that aren't listening to me. lol

nerdsgetmehot 22

Sunday 28 November 2010 17:58

#108 I love it, too! :D #138 Nope. Totes magoats just means "totally." It doesn't mean "an awkward moment."

trclocke 1

Friday 26 November 2010 21:02

For the record, I've heard this before, years ago. It was paraphrased in a way that made me unable to find it, but I'm pretty sure it's on bash.org somewhere.

Draminicaus 0

Friday 26 November 2010 22:32

I was thinking I have seen this somewhere before. I can't quite put my finger on it, but this feels strangely familiar.

worldclass 0

Friday 26 November 2010 21:30

This is so dumb.

qwertyuiop44 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 9:21

totally a matter of opinion. mine is to disagree with yours, and call you a fool for being a 'hater'

cheech99 0

Friday 26 November 2010 21:59

such a whitey

perdix 29

Friday 26 November 2010 22:19

Good thing he didn't sucker-punch you and take your griddle. Usually, famous rap stars go for more high-end kitchenware, but I guess if a stupid fan has a cheap griddle right there, you might as well relieve him of it ;)