Just Hanging On By FML Approved - 20/10/2017 20:30 It'll get better. Eventually. I agree, your life sucks 402 You deserved it 108 Share Tweet Share
Today, a kid got his hand stuck inside my store's giant gumball machine. He started crying, and his negligent trainwreck of a mom bitched me out for being "unobservant." I'd been mopping up the mess she'd made after she'd spilled an open can of beer all over the floor. FML I agree, your life sucks 32 743 You deserved it 1 827
Today, I was making out like a sixteen year old at the high school prom with this guy I kinda liked. All of a sudden, he rolls away and tells me he's "finished." We both had our clothes on the entire time. He is 23, I'm 25. I didn't know that was possible. FML I agree, your life sucks 24 474 You deserved it 3 883
Today, my girlfriend pawned in her mother's engagement ring so she could gamble at the pokies. FML I agree, your life sucks 481 You deserved it 122
Today, while I was standing in the elevator with a few people I just met when I moved in yesterday, I felt something fall on my hair and dusted it off. It was a cockroach. None of them will come within a 1m distance to me now, because they all think I've got lice. Welcome to the building! FML I agree, your life sucks 26 114 You deserved it 2 418
Today, my son asked if there was a way to make parenting easier. I sarcastically told him he could be a deadbeat who sees his kid every two weeks. He must have thought I was serious because he broke up with his girlfriend and baby, turned up at my door expecting to have his old room, and told my wife it was my idea. FML I agree, your life sucks 782 You deserved it 1 207
Today, as I was strapping my boogie board to my wrist, a wave slammed the board right into my crotch. Hard. FML I agree, your life sucks 744 You deserved it 163
If that was my kid, I'd tell him to get up and walk.