Joe Bidet By userrrrr - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 456 You deserved it 3 840 Share Tweet Share
Today, I won a game of Monopoly against my girlfriend. She reacted by sweeping the board off the table, storming out the front door, and mowing down my mailbox driving away. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 858 You deserved it 4 340
Today, I left my dog alone while I went to work, as usual. He usually hangs out in the big bay window that faces the street. Today he decided to steal my vibrator and chew it while sitting in the window. I can only imagine how many people walked by and saw it. FML I agree, your life sucks 35 051 You deserved it 7 242
Today, my friends and I went out to dinner. Being short on cash, I suggested a game where we put our phones in the center of the table and first to check their phone had to pay the bill. Our conversation died out, and fearful of having an awkward silence, I checked my phone. FML I agree, your life sucks 7 425 You deserved it 55 371
Today, while taking the trash out, the old cranky elevator in my apartment complex finally gave up on life. For a long hour I was stuck between floors 4 and 5, practically embracing my bio-waste can. FML I agree, your life sucks 23 023 You deserved it 1 913
Today, more than fifteen years of marriage and sex at least once a week has given my otherwise lovely husband the stamina to last a minute and a half. We've cum together less than five times. FML I agree, your life sucks 828 You deserved it 293
Today, my dad uttered the dreaded words, “Now don’t worry boy, I knows exactly what I is doing.” A few short minutes later he has a destroyed impact drill, my ladder is snapped, my kitchen window is broken, my wife is in hospital for stitches, and we can’t find the cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 573 You deserved it 116
There's a keeper!
Are you sure she wasn't joking... i mean... come on... who does that?