FML's Showdown #9 By Louis - 17/05/2017 21:30 - France - Paris This week, check out some dudes mishandling some heavy machinery and vote for your fave. I agree, your life sucks 570 You deserved it 152 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "You know, I'm looking RIGHT at you." FML I agree, your life sucks 27 048 You deserved it 89 587
Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 377 You deserved it 7 879
Today, my boyfriend told me that he is homophobic. This wouldn't be such a big deal, if my mother wasn't a lesbian. He doesn't know this yet, and I'm afraid to tell him. FML I agree, your life sucks 41 502 You deserved it 7 045
Today, I told the man I've been in love with for 3 years, who also happens to be my boss, how I felt. He responds by filing sexual harassment charges against me. FML I agree, your life sucks 18 802 You deserved it 35 287
Today, it was my mom's birthday, I planned to wish her a happy birthday as she woke up. I opened the door to her room, only to see my dad dancing around in an American flag thong. Grimacing in pain, I closed the door right away. Not only am I forever disturbed, but now my dad is asking me how he looks naked. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 251 You deserved it 7 233
Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML I agree, your life sucks 29 795 You deserved it 76 044
Today, the cops pulled over and tried to arrest my friends for transportation of a corpse and murder. Just because you find a body in the back of a truck bed, wrapped in a blanket cocoon and apparently unresponsive, does not mean they are dead. I was very much alive, thank you very much. FML I agree, your life sucks 6 375 You deserved it 2 426
Today, at work, a customer I've never met before congratulated me on my gender transition and told me how brave I was. I'm not transgender, I'm just short and baby-faced. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 871 You deserved it 235
#Quentin
#Roberto