FML's Showdown #11 By Louis - 31/05/2017 17:25 Another chance for you to pick your winner of the week. So, who does it for you? I agree, your life sucks 469 You deserved it 133 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 705 You deserved it 3 785
Today, I bought a cutting board at a Dollar Store that had a helpful kitchen guide printed on it. It was supposed to list “liquid conversions” but instead said “liquid conversations.” My husband quipped that it reminded him of me in college. I'm a recovering alcoholic. FML I agree, your life sucks 317 You deserved it 137
Today, my mother came over again to help me work on my Student Aid application. She also brought over the savings bonds that she has been accumulating since I was born to help pay for college. Turns out they won't reach maturity until I'm thirty. She never bothered to check out this fact. I'm screwed for college. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 572 You deserved it 3 436
Today, a friend of mine and I were talking about how hygienic we are. She mentioned she hadn't shaved her downstairs in a while. I was looking at the computer when she said this so when I turned to look at her I saw she had pulled down her pants and underwear. I was face to face with hairy muff. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 779 You deserved it 4 096
Today, for my birthday, I'd told my boyfriend I wanted a full day in bed with Netflix, champagne, frequent sex, and a takeaway pizza at teatime. He managed sex twice 4 hours apart, kept falling asleep watching Netflix, drank too much, and threw up his pizza all over my boobs. FML I agree, your life sucks 570 You deserved it 303
Today, in my early morning haze, I tried to find the setting on my phone that would stop my cat meowing for his breakfast. FML I agree, your life sucks 6 266 You deserved it 1 383
Trevor
Trevor.