Intimacy: Dirty talk

Dirty talk

By awkward - 22/02/2014 05:39 - United States

Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML

agreeclassic 57 645

vote type 1 10 491

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Anonymous - 29/12/2014 02:49 - United States - Wilmington

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML

agreeclassic 36 331

vote type 1 17 986

By HOe HOe HOe - 02/11/2011 02:36 - United States

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

agreeclassic 37 110

vote type 1 16 281

The L word

By Anonymous - 26/05/2014 15:53 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

agreeclassic 52 158

vote type 1 7 137

Good girl

By bianca131 - 10/11/2015 03:42 - Australia

Today, I was having sex with someone I've been casually seeing. He got all weird during it, and said, "That's a good girl". Once he left, I told my housemates about it. Now every time I do something nice for them, they respond, "That's a good girl". FML

agreeclassic 28 016

vote type 1 8 225

Submission

By Anonymous - 24/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontaneous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML

agreeclassic 2 528

vote type 1 1 930

By undoable - 08/09/2010 23:14 - United States

Today, I was doing it with my girlfriend. Trying to be sexy, I moaned her name. She replied, "What?" FML

agreeclassic 30 220

vote type 1 9 777

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

agreeclassic 20 633

vote type 1 91 096

Get on with it

By KaRaSu - 22/11/2008 12:24 - France

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML

agreeclassic 37 957

vote type 1 7 123

By Anonymous - 01/06/2013 07:51 - United States - Portland

Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML

agreeclassic 90 159

vote type 1 6 184

By unbelievable208 - 05/08/2009 05:28 - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it, I whispered in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I then heard behind me, "I am." FML

agreeclassic 48 681

vote type 1 86 795

Wakachulak 22

Saturday 22 February 2014 12:58

Well, at least you know she hasn't done anything.

Alyxi 20

Saturday 22 February 2014 13:00

are you sure she wasn't just trying to play along?

Comments

LUFT 12

Monday 24 February 2014 8:42

Hahaha! Am I the only one who thinks she is adorable???

haiimangel 4

Monday 24 February 2014 9:46

Something I would say.

MymB612 14

Monday 24 February 2014 14:07

Wait, so you're having "kinky sex", yet she is unaware that "you're a bad girl" is supposed to be sexy? Now i'm wondering if you even know what "kinky sex" is.

DanielleinDC 33

Monday 24 February 2014 20:36

At least she didn't laugh at you for calling her a bad girl. I think she was just playing along and expected you to tell her what she had "done" and what her "punishment" is.