Sex and Intimacy: Desperate - FML

Desperate

By yourmainman - 28/01/2013 05:03 - Canada

Spicy

Today, after months of lacking intimacy in our relationship, my girlfriend decided to spice things up by covering her naked body with whipped cream. Except, we didn't have any in the fridge, so instead I had to politely lick shaving cream off of her while fighting the urge to vomit. FML

agreeclassic 55 971

vote type 1 15 983

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By fml - 07/03/2010 15:46 - United States

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Today, I agreed to let my boyfriend cover every inch of my body in whipped cream and lick it off. We were both enjoying it until his 9 year old sister walked in and started crying. FML

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By Anonymous - 05/02/2022 21:59

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Today, it's been one week since spicing things up with mine and my husband's sex life by involving whipped cream. We can now smell of out of date diary, no matter what soap products we use showering. FML

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By Sad, but true - 02/02/2022 08:01 - Canada

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By hannah12345 - 26/02/2010 17:54 - France

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Today, my mother walked in on my boyfriend licking whipped cream off my nipples. FML

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By welted - 01/01/2010 05:21 - Canada

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Today, my fiancé and I decided to engage in some erotic food play. She covered every region of my body, including my genitals, with strawberry sauce. Today also happens to be the day that I found out I'm allergic to strawberries. FML

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By bad in the sack - 05/07/2014 04:26 - United States

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Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

superpoptart 24

Monday 28 January 2013 12:04

You sound like a caring boyfriend... But seriously you could've asked to shower together? Your girlfriend is definitely dumb though. Good luck.

K92 13

Monday 28 January 2013 12:04

Omg op that's disgusting! You guys didn't have any chocolate?

Comments

ocramavaf 15

Monday 28 January 2013 18:16

she gets 10 for effort tought, or maybe a solid 8 for not buying the whipped cream

SwisherSweets024 4

Monday 28 January 2013 18:44

I'm mad that bitch really did cover her body in shaving cream and I'm even more mad that you licked it off..ur girl is dumb

honestyslife 9

Monday 28 January 2013 18:45

You're honestly the most cooperative man there is.... Because I would have been out in 2.2 seconds

aleia18 3

Monday 28 January 2013 18:51

Time for a new girlfriend

jonnyscash 12

Monday 28 January 2013 19:07

Should have used the phrase " I mustache you a question"

nicholasj96 9

Monday 28 January 2013 19:17

-.- wtf ?

MikeyScene420 17

Monday 28 January 2013 19:19

I covered myself in whipped cream one time

Kalipczo 21

Monday 28 January 2013 19:26

"honey why don't you have an erection?"

Thatguy334 7

Monday 28 January 2013 19:29

Dude if you're stupid enough to do that, you deserve it

kellyelly 9

Monday 28 January 2013 19:45

Just say no!!

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