Budget Spa By FML Approved - 25/10/2017 20:30 Who else is ready to take a personal day with this dog? I agree, your life sucks 506 You deserved it 120 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was trying to sneak up my husband while he was playing a computer game. As I was getting behind the chair, he paused the game and sat up straight. I stopped. He turned around and sneezed violently and blew a bunch of snot into my face and eyes. FML I agree, your life sucks 32 822 You deserved it 19 491
Today, on vacation, I had my first encounter with a macaw parrot, who promptly bit my ear and shat on me while amused tourists laughed and took pictures. FML I agree, your life sucks 4 269 You deserved it 422
Today, I tried to take a cool selfie with my coffee mug for Instagram. As I posed, I didn’t realize the mug was tilted, and I poured hot coffee all over myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 74 You deserved it 714
Today, my stupid husband took away my Xbox because he happened to read the game warning that pregnant women should take precautions before playing. I have two months of bed rest left before I give birth and no Xbox. I’ll go mad if I have to just sit and watch TV. I want my Assassin's Creed back. FML I agree, your life sucks 569 You deserved it 166
Today, my girlfriend's mom and my dad met for the first time. We discovered that they are each other's exes, and not only that, my girlfriend, whom I have been dating, hanging out, confiding with, being intimate with, shared each other's first times, and plan to marry, is actually my half-sister. FML I agree, your life sucks 637 You deserved it 68
Today, I was waitressing. Two of the patrons, who were fathers, insisted on having their food taken off the bill because it’s Father’s Day and “ChatGPT said” they can get free food. We refused and said there’s no such thing. When I collected the check, I saw they wrote “fat bitch” on the tip line. FML I agree, your life sucks 491 You deserved it 68
I see carrots. Is it a bath, or are they making a stew?
Ok... that is just too cute for words! :)