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Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Vacation

    Thanks, I hate it

    By MdT - 23/05/2009 11:51 - South Africa

    Today, my family returned from a holiday in Egypt. A holiday that I really wanted to spend with them. As if leaving me behind wasn't bad enough, they then made me watch a 200-picture slideshow of how much fun they had. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 49 913
    You deserved it 3 715
    Share  

    Housekeeper

    By Anonymous - 11/05/2009 19:45 - United States

    Today, I took my parents and 3 sisters to the airport so they could take a trip to Hawaii. I wasn't invited because they don't like my husband. They asked me to watch the dog and water the plants. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 57 031
    You deserved it 7 455
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    Keywords

    Love Pranks Miscellaneous Coworkers Jealousy Accident ADHD Autism Relatable Mental health Kids Health Embarrassing Gross Poopoo peepee Family Cute Medication Friends Birthday Mysterious Weird Ghosting Haircut Money Awkward Painful My ex Sex Theater
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
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    Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 22 554
    You deserved it 45 244
    Today, I found the Christmas 'newsletter' my mom sends out every year to our extended family and friends that details our activities and achievements of the past year. I wasn't mentioned once. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 26 222
    You deserved it 3 588
    Today, I showed by ID to get into a bar and the bouncer kept it because he said it wasn't me. It was. Apparently I've gained so much weight I am unrecognizable. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 41 569
    You deserved it 15 953
    Today, I told my 8 year-old daughter that she looks a lot like mommy. Now she won't come out of her room because she thinks she's ugly. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 54 972
    You deserved it 6 297
    Today, I babysat the neighbors’ evil kids. They dropped them over at my house and I played with them for five hours. After taking the brats back home and putting them to bed, their mother asked me what time I came back to the house. She only paid me for the 20 minutes I was in their house. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 736
    You deserved it 156
    Today, I bought a dragon dildo after many years of curiosity and recently, one too many glasses of wine. As I lined it up next to my forearm, the reality that it would go INTO me set in. I can't return it as it is not the seller's fault. I'm throwing it away tomorrow before someone I know finds it. Curiosity killed the cat. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 88
    You deserved it 390
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