Miscellaneous

Many such cases

By Link - 11/03/2025 17:00 - United States - Pittsfield

Today, a friend was moving away, and they told me go grab their credit card. I did, and she bought me Dunkin' Donuts, then I tripped and dumped both our drinks. Into her face. I tried to say "Fuck!" and "I didn't mean to do that to you!" but ended up yelling "FUCK YOU!" in the middle of a parking lot. I never saw her again. FML

agreeclassic 184

vote type 1 431

Served cold

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my sister and I got into a fight. I came home to find everything in my room covered in ketchup. FML

agreeclassic 31 531

vote type 1 4 910

As usual

By jadakorn - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML

agreeclassic 47 426

vote type 1 29 692

The Cure's "Why Can't I Be You?"

By Anonymous - 10/03/2025 22:00 - United States - Edison

Today, I saw this other trans man at college. He comes from a very accepting family, who let him go on testosterone. He’s so handsome, I’m so jealous. I get an ache in my chest when I see him. I can't help but think, "How is this fair? Why can’t I be that handsome?" I feel so disgusting for being jealous of him. FML

agreeclassic 374

vote type 1 466

Thanks?

By Sheila - 10/03/2025 12:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I wore a new outfit that I thought was super cute. I was feeling confident until a seemingly drunk woman came up to me in a bar, tapped me on the shoulder, and said, “I don’t know what you were going for with this", gesturing at my outfit, "but it’s not working.” Then she stumbled off to join her friends. FML

agreeclassic 427

vote type 1 96

Stressed out

By Anonymous - 10/03/2025 09:00 - United States - Memphis

Today, I was in a packed elevator when I heard a loud noise. I assumed someone had farted, so I tried to discreetly turn around and hold my breath. To my horror, the loud noise was actually the elevator malfunctioning and dropping a few floors. I made it even more awkward by holding my breath, and the guy next to me asked, “You good?” FML

agreeclassic 204

vote type 1 308

I'm done

By Anonymous - 09/03/2025 20:00 - Canada

Today, I was using a public restroom when the lights suddenly turned off. Panicking, I waved my arms around, trying to trigger the motion sensor, but nothing happened. I had to finish in the dark, and as I was leaving, the janitor noticed me, turned the lights back on, and said, “Yeah, I turned those off earlier to save power. Hope you were OK in there.” FML

agreeclassic 447

vote type 1 93

Slapped

By Username - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my mum suggested that I should take self-defence lessons just in case I ever get attacked. Jokingly, I said, "As long as I walk under street lamps, no one's going to touch me." She replied, "Well, you never know, they might mistake you for someone good looking." FML

agreeclassic 32 730

vote type 1 5 001

Hydrated pinkies

By Anonymous - 09/03/2025 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, we went for a foot massage. My wife found it incredibly relaxing; I just found it weird that a complete stranger seemed to be trying to give each of my toes its own handjob. Plus they used so much moisturiser that it made the inside of my shoes feel like squishy mud all day. FML

agreeclassic 334

vote type 1 137

Past glory

By Olivia - 09/03/2025 00:00 - United States - Fresno

Today, I attended my high school reunion and was feeling good about the gym progress I’d made. Looking fabulous, I was ready to relive my glory days when I got into a conversation with someone I didn’t recognize. He had to remind me that we were in the same chemistry class for two years. I had no idea who he was. FML

agreeclassic 139

vote type 1 420

Hangry

By Anonymous - 08/03/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I was starving and ordered pizza. They said it would take 30 minutes. When it arrived an hour later, I was so hangry, I didn’t even wait for the delivery guy to leave. I grabbed the pizza box, ripped it open, and immediately dropped it face-down onto the ground. I ended up eating a slice of cold, dirt-covered pizza like a sad, defeated animal. FML

agreeclassic 109

vote type 1 695

Chill zone

By notnicefools - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - San Diego

Today, I went to visit my husband's grave. I was unable to mourn in peace because some teenagers were smoking pot and talking about a government conspiracy "to change the way gravity works" on the next grave over. FML

agreeclassic 40 058

vote type 1 2 368

School sucks

By Anonymous - 07/03/2025 15:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had a substitute for science and I was standing at the stationary table when some other guy came over and made the thing wobble. The whole thing fell over and I got all the blame. Then I was sitting with my friends at lunch but another friend came back right when my crush was gonna sit next to me. FML

agreeclassic 292

vote type 1 149

Not a people person

By Anna - 07/03/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I tried to sneak out of a family gathering without anyone noticing. As I tiptoed toward the door, I stepped on my aunt's prized chihuahua's squeaky toy. The entire house went silent as it squeaked at quite the volume, and everyone turned to stare at me. My "escape" turned into the most dramatic exit of my life. FML

agreeclassic 281

vote type 1 239

With friends like these…

By marz88 - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

agreeclassic 40 109

vote type 1 7 254

No contact

By Newbrokehome - 06/03/2025 20:00 - United States - Pleasant Hope

Today, I'm closing on my first house. Everyone's congratulating me, but all I can think about is the impending fallout when I tell my abusive, psychotic mother she's not welcome and the family sides with her. FML

agreeclassic 517

vote type 1 98

Make yourselves at home

By unlucky neighbors - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - China - Shanghai

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

agreeclassic 45 743

vote type 1 3 443

Relax

By Anonymous - 05/03/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I was craving some comfort food, so I grabbed a bag of nachos from the cupboard and sat down to binge-watch Netflix. As I opened the bag, the chips exploded everywhere, spilling all over the couch, and floor. I spent the next half hour picking up crumbs while my dog and cats happily ate the scraps. FML

agreeclassic 344

vote type 1 152

Stranger danger

By Dani - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I happened to make eye contact with a stranger standing on a balcony of the apartment building across the train tracks from mine. He ran his finger across his neck like a knife and winked at me. I'm afraid to go out again. FML

agreeclassic 33 335

vote type 1 2 690

Soggy mess

By Baffled - 04/03/2025 06:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my wife went and bought a set of fancy, expensive towels and threw all our old towels away. These new towels don't dry. I've been rubbing myself for ten minutes and I'm still wet. How did she buy expensive, broken towels? How do you make a towel that doesn't dry? FML

agreeclassic 474

vote type 1 92

Manifesto?

By Anonymous - 04/03/2025 01:00 - United States - Grand Junction

Today, I woke up to news that a document had been made about me and about 50% of my friends left me behind after reading it. None of the alleged acts are true. FML

agreeclassic 402

vote type 1 97

Not on the weekend

By jtaylor94 - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, my dad's boss called our house and I answered. He said, "Is your dad home?" I replied, "I'll go check." I put the phone on mute and asked my dad if he wanted to talk to his boss. My dad says, "Does that asshole not have a life?" Turns out the phone wasn't on mute, it was on speaker. FML

agreeclassic 19 504

vote type 1 43 177

Perfect performance

By I hate myself - 02/03/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I walked into a café for the first time, and as I opened the door, I slammed it into the face of a poor barista. Embarrassed, I tried to apologize while holding the door open for a woman behind me, only to have my hand slip and the door crash into her as well. I then stood there, frozen, as both of them just stared at me as I apologized with, "I swear I'm not a moron." FML

agreeclassic 387

vote type 1 110

I hate dancing

By Anonymous - 02/03/2025 09:00 - Australia

Today, I was at a wedding and I reluctantly joined the dance floor. As soon as I started dancing, I felt my trousers rip. Trying to save face, I kept dancing, hoping no one would notice. A few minutes later, I realized my silk boxer shorts were completely visible to the entire party. FML

agreeclassic 154

vote type 1 408

Give some, take some

By Stinky - this FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Roanoke

Today, I learned that some days you win, and some days you clean up skunk carcass with a snow shovel, in the rain, in formerly waterproof boots. FML

agreeclassic 4 403

vote type 1 369

Sunday funday

By Anonymous - 02/03/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I spilled a bottle of honey on the floor while preparing breakfast. As I frantically tried to clean it up, my cat deemed it the perfect opportunity to slide and pad through the sticky mess like a slip-n-slide. Now, I have a honey-coated cat, a ruined floor, and a sticky mess to clean up before my roommates get home. FML

agreeclassic 371

vote type 1 121

One thing at a time

By Anonymous - 01/03/2025 16:00 - United States

Today, I stuck my house key up my nose by accident. Why? I was taking them out to unlock the door and needed to straighten my glasses. FML

agreeclassic 211

vote type 1 297

The opposite of Stars Hollow

By Anonymous - 01/03/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, I recently moved to a new place. People around me here have been ignoring me from day one. It feels awkward and embarrassing to not get response when i talk to them. I'm an extrovert but still I can't cope up with this behavior. It's like they are observing my moves, and it's kind of creepy too. FML

agreeclassic 336

vote type 1 160

Wedding fatigue

By takeiteasy - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my wife and I went to a wedding. At one in the morning, when the cheese was being served, we were starting to fall asleep at the table, so we went to our car to take a short nap. When we woke up it was 5 a.m., and the party was over. FML

agreeclassic 9 803

vote type 1 34 974

Sticky

By Anonymous - 01/03/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I thought I was clever for doing my laundry while multitasking and making dinner. When I went to transfer my clothes from the washer to the dryer, I discovered that I'd accidentally washed a pack of gum that was in my pocket. The gum had melted into my favorite shirt, and I now have a sticky mess to deal with. FML

agreeclassic 345

vote type 1 159

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, my husband was using the microwave when we suddenly hear a huge 'POP'. The good news is we found our daughter's missing hamster. FML

agreeclassic 22 524

vote type 1 4 768

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

agreeclassic 23 815

vote type 1 44 348

Today, my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. I walked about 3 miles to the nearest house to call a tow truck. When I got back to where I left my car, it was gone. FML

agreeclassic 15 262

vote type 1 1 256

Today, my mom noticed that there weren’t any tampons in the trashcan during my usual time of the month, and promptly grounded me. I’m not pregnant, I just skip periods sometimes. FML

agreeclassic 837

vote type 1 115

Today, I realized ruined I'd my life forever when i broke up with the girl of my dreams by being stupid 11 years ago and I'm still missing her. I haven't been able to move on ever since, and she is now married and has a kid. Don't ever take anyone for granted, I know I deserve this but… FML

agreeclassic 238

vote type 1 1 167

Today, I found out that people can get ringworm from cats. I found out because I have ringworm. I don't have a cat. Then I remembered I helped a friend move about two weeks ago, and spent the night sharing a bed with her cat. That's the last time I ever help her move. FML

agreeclassic 26 952

vote type 1 4 113