Freudian slip By someonevexed - 01/02/2009 19:01 - Germany Today, my boyfriend called me by his mother's name for the 100th time. I'm a guy. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 044 You deserved it 10 235 Share Tweet Share
Dude, STFU! By Cyberdeeder - 13/10/2008 08:19 Today, at the cinema, I sat next to a guy who couldn’t stand a minute without laughing or making comments about the film. FML I agree, your life sucks 75 162 You deserved it 20 275 Share Tweet Share
Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML I agree, your life sucks 40 692 You deserved it 9 977
Today, I found out that I can get my girlfriend to make more sex noises by massaging her back than I can by actually having sex with her. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 957 You deserved it 7 492
Today, I had dinner with the girl I thought I would end up marrying. Everything was going well and after I had paid the bill, she said she was a lesbian. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, she challenged me to see who could hook up with a straight girl first. I lost. FML I agree, your life sucks 87 720 You deserved it 7 431
Today, I got my license renewed and the woman behind the desk looked at me and said "guess we need to update the weight, huh?". FML I agree, your life sucks 39 091 You deserved it 6 029
Today, I realized why a female colleague keeps asking me if I'm high when I'm not. All I'm thinking when I see her is how glad I am to see her. Dilated pupils, flushed face, stupid grin on my face? I'm not high. I'm in love with her. She's married. Oh, and she wants to be my roommate for a year. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 606 You deserved it 591
Today, while in the shower, I heard my phone buzz. Expecting an important text, I leaned out to check it. I slipped, hit my head on the sink, and ended up stuck in the most awkward position possible with one leg in the shower and the other out. My roommate had to rescue me. FML I agree, your life sucks 330 You deserved it 221