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Out of time

By STRESSED OUT - 01/08/2026 15:00 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, I set ten alarms for an important appointment and still woke up convinced I’d missed it. I spent the morning panicking for no reason and showed up looking exactly how I felt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 222

Where is my mind?

By Anonymous - 01/08/2026 22:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I spent minutes trying to open my apartment door before realizing I was one floor above my own. My terrified neighbor watched me struggle with my keys through their peephole the entire time, until he yelled "I'M CALLING 911!" and I realized where I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 140

You deserved it 297

Showtime

By dumbass - 03/08/2026 15:00 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, I spent 5 minutes trying to get into my car because the key fob wouldn't work. It wasn't my car. Same model, same colour, same parking spot, just wrong floor. The actual owner was watching me struggle from the Aldi trolley station the whole time, clearly amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 272

UFO

By Anonymous - 29/07/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, I found a mysterious container in the back of my fridge. I opened it to try and figure out what it was. I still don't know what it was, but now my entire flat smells like it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 277

OK, that's that cleared up

By Zacharian - 02/08/2026 00:00 - United States - Pittsburg

Today, I found out my hot Mormon neighbors can be gay, but they can’t act on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 271

Gated and confused

By Anonymous - 04/08/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I checked in for my flight, made it through TSA, bought food, and sat at the gate for an hour. I only realized I was sitting at the wrong gate when boarding for another flight finished and everyone had left. I ran to the correct gate, but it was too late. Despite me pleading, the plane was already taxiing to the runway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 551

Time to bail

By Anonymous - 06/08/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I realized I hate my wife with a fiery passion. I honestly don’t even care. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 356

Loose fit

By Anonymous - 06/08/2026 12:00 - United States - Sanford

Today, I got new thongs that were too big, but wore them anyway. It was fine until they got caught on a door handle when I held the door open with my back. The whole conference room saw the door basically give me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 351

Claws out

By Anonymous - 23/08/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I rescued a tiny kitten from the rain and brought him inside. I dried him off, gave him food, and wrapped him in a blanket. He immediately climbed onto my lap, purred for ten minutes, then sprinted upstairs and started destroying my curtains. I saved a cat. The cat saved nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 208

My hobbies include…

By Anonymous - 21/08/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I found out my husband is addicted to porn. Granted, it's free porn and he has not spent a single dollar on anything (I saw the bank statements), but it's still just tearing my heart apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 189

Clack clack

By Anonymous - 29/07/2026 20:00 - Australia

Today, I heard my washing machine making a strange noise. I nervously waited for the cycle to end so I could open it and investigate. The noise was my car keys. I'd somehow washed them, my wallet and $20 without noticing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 312

Surveillance 24/7

By Traveller - 18/08/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my smart fridge sent me a notification saying the door had been left open. I ran downstairs, and discovered I had apparently connected the fridge to my phone correctly. For some reason, it was warning me about the open door in the hotel room three cities away that I'd stayed in last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 246

Square eyes

By Anonymous - 02/08/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I received a notification that my phone screen time was down by 40% this week. I was incredibly proud of myself until I remembered I'd spent most of the week watching TV instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 263

No good deed…

By Anonymous - 01/08/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I made a small batch of cookies and took them to work. Mostly everyone took one, but nobody said anything until I asked how they were. Someone asked what my recipe was, because it tasted like I'd forgot to add sugar. I bit into one. I had. The cookies tasted like muddy mush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 118

You deserved it 342

Where am I?

By Doordashed - 28/07/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I got a notification that my food had been delivered. I opened my front door and found nothing. After ten minutes of panic, I checked the delivery photo. It was of my old apartment. I moved out eight months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 381

Y'all better run

By Anonymous - 05/08/2026 15:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, my psycho ex showed up at my doorstep to beg me to take her back, so I pulled my gun on her. I just found out she's pressing charges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 834

Unfair ruling

By Anonymous - 26/08/2026 09:00 - United States - Arlington

Today, my late sister's kids are in separate foster homes and I was told I can't have custody of them because I'm not a resident of their state (California). I can't afford to live there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 15

This is awkward…

By Anonymous - 20/08/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my brother and I spent almost $600 to plan and throw a divorce party for our mother. She proceeded to announce that she and our dad are staying together and that we completely jumped the gun. We deserve it, but… FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 367

New fangled technology

By Anonymous - 08/08/2026 22:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months and tried to act like I belonged there. I used the wrong machine, adjusted something I shouldn’t have, and had to ask a teenager how to reset it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 284

You deal with it

By Anonymous - 07/08/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, one year after giving my girlfriend an ultimatum that if she aborted our baby, then I would leave, she had the baby… and then left it with me. Now I'm stuck as a single parent while she is out living the high life, wanting nothing to do with either of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 1 152

I'll play chicken in my sleep

By Maya - 07/08/2026 00:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I’m the latest learner of the lesson that, however desperate one is for relief from both, it is wrong to take sleeping pills (for insomnia) and laxatives (for constipation) on the same night. I'd have been fine alone. The catch is a night of pooping as I slept taught my guy that I’m bad to sleep with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 113

You deserved it 407

Powered up

By Super Genius - 17/08/2026 09:00 - United States - Steele

Today, my computer mouse suddenly stopped working. Assuming it had died, I put a new battery in. It still didn't work. After spending several hours trying to understand what problem it could possibly have, I figured out that it helps if you don't put the battery in backwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 319

What would you do?

By Jacks jacket - 26/08/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I wore a jacket I bought yesterday at a thrift store to work. During lunch, I found a folded note in the inside pocket that said, "Call Mom. Tell her I'm okay." I spent the rest of the day wondering who had owned the jacket and whether I should actually call the number on the note. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 55

Bathroom Ninja

By skittish - 04/08/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I tried to quietly leave a public toilet at work without anyone noticing how long I'd been in there. The automatic hand dryer turned on as I walked past, making me jump so hard, I walked straight into the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 323

Bathroom police

By Anonymous - 12/08/2026 22:00 - The Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, it was 5th period and I went to the year 11 bathroom. I came out, and there was a crowd of people outside. Someone said, "Um, that's the boys bathroom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 224

Happy birthday!

By Broke girl - 31/07/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I told my friends that I’d cover dinner for my birthday. Five minutes later, my bank app hit me with a low-balance alert. Everyone had already picked their orders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 111

You deserved it 422

Caught in the act

By Anonymous - 29/07/2026 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned that when your flatmate admits she’s an exhibitionist and you say you’re OK with it, it doesn’t means she going to walk around naked like you hoped, it means she’s going to bring guys home and do them at times I’m guaranteed to “accidentally catch them.” Why couldn’t she do me instead? FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 325

Don't drink and Amazon

By Anonymous - 14/08/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I found a package outside my door and assumed that I'd drunk-ordered shit on Amazon. I opened it before checking the label, which I should've done because it was addressed to my neighbor, and contained 6 pounds of live crickets for someone's pet lizard. I have never closed a box faster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 368

Hydrate!

By Anonymous - 24/08/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, I bought a fancy reusable water bottle because I wanted to be properly hydrated. On the first day, I filled it, put it in my backpack, and went to work. Six hours later, I discovered the lid wasn't fully closed. My laptop survived, but every document in my bag smelled like cucumber. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 284

Let me in

By Anonymous - 24/08/2026 15:00 - Canada

Today, I locked myself out while taking the trash downstairs. I was wearing pajamas, slippers, and a winter coat over nothing else. My neighbor offered to help, then spent ten minutes trying not to laugh while I explained that my keys were sitting on the kitchen counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 207

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The Top

Today, I tried a new hairstyle to impress a guy I like. I was pretty confident, until he took one look at me and said, "Uh... why's there an onion on your head?" So much for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 266

You deserved it 6 857

Today, my smartphone addiction reached a new level of pathetic when I checked my weather app to see if it was cloudy outside. There was a window right behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 949

You deserved it 41 157

Today, my father called the cops saying I stole his car. It's my car, but his name is on the title. Why did he report it stolen? Because rather than taking him to a bar and being his designated driver, I went to a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 311

You deserved it 150

Today, I burped and sneezed during a job interview, I don’t think they were impressed by my talents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 732

You deserved it 253

Today, I realized I'm very much in love with my old boyfriend. I got married to someone else a few months ago, who I also very much love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 1 262

Today, I am now sans job due to burnout. My supervisors recognized I was overworked, and I'd told them I was not able to keep up with all the roles loaded on. I guess firing me was the best business solution. FML

I agree, your life sucks 574

You deserved it 148