Health

So I've never really been one for fake nails and I used to play the violin so I kept them as short as possible which is a habit I've kept. They aren't that long really (nowhere near claw length), so when my mum asked I thought it wouldn't be a problem. Um, yeah... No... I'm still on the toilet... Well not really, but I'm going to try getting these off as soon as I can, they're just weird to me. I think my mother will "nail" the exam, thanks for the puns and sympathy! :)

By rolypoly - 05/03/2014 12:33 - United Kingdom

Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last 2 miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 542

You deserved it 5 650

By loserr - 28/02/2014 17:13 - United States - Highland Park

Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 078

You deserved it 7 167

Shine on

By owmyfoot - 24/02/2014 02:22 - United States - Sacramento

Today, while walking barefoot through my house, I saw something shine on the floor across the hallway. Curious as to what it was, I rubbed my foot across the carpet to feel it. It wasn't until it was deeply lodged in my foot did I realize it was an open safety pin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 682

You deserved it 40 892

By Anonymous - 21/02/2014 02:46 - United States - Glasford

Today, at my therapy appointment, I was spilling my guts to my therapist. When I'd finished, to get rid of the awkward silence, I asked, "I'm not crazy, right?" His response was, "That's bit of a loaded question." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 192

You deserved it 5 943

Scream

By dating a pussy - 18/02/2014 21:15 - United States - Maryville

Today, I was watching TV, when I heard a blood-curdling scream from my boyfriend upstairs. It sounded like he was being murdered with a rusty fork, and I rushed to see what the hell was going on, hitting my shin against the stairs in the process. He'd stubbed his toe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 264

You deserved it 5 765

By Tomb Raider Wannabe - 18/02/2014 01:57 - Australia - Premer

Today, I was feeling really good about myself for running and walking everywhere so much so that I was out of breath and panting. Well, until I remembered that I was playing a video game and it was my character that was doing the running around that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 954

You deserved it 43 954

By extra crispy or original recipe - 16/02/2014 22:23 - United States - Grand Prairie

Today, I have Hello Kitty band-aids on my nips because I dozed off while tanning and burned them extra crispy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 546

You deserved it 42 869

By gaiakirkland - 15/02/2014 11:18 - Italy - Pompiano

Today, I was on a date, when I suddenly choked on my own saliva and coughed so hard that I passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 280

You deserved it 5 166

gaiakirkland tells us more.

gaiakirkland 10

Sunday 16 February 2014 10:41

To the ones asking if he stayed at least until I woke up, or if I had good luck, let's say that besides being my crush, he's a friend of mine so obviously he stayed, and agreed to go out again, so hopefully next time I won't pass out. For the one that says she can swallow since she was born, thank you very much dear, I suppose you can also walk since you were 1 and you still trip over your own feet sometimes :)

By mrosewrosem - 13/02/2014 11:54 - United Kingdom - Aldershot

Today, during an important exam, I had a huge panic attack and had to run out of the exam hall. Everyone saw me, and now everywhere I go, people keep pretending to have a panic attack and run away from me. I have to spend two more years with these assholes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 850

You deserved it 7 535

mrosewrosem tells us more.

mrosewrosem 12

Thursday 13 February 2014 20:25

Hey guys, this was actually me before I signed up for an account. Thanks for all the supportive messages, you guys rock! You're right, anxiety is a bitch! All those who said YDI, no-one deserves anxiety or any other mental disorder... just like no-one deserves any illness eg. cancer.