Miscellaneous Today, I was running a marathon. I stopped to massage my stiff...

Anonymous - 25/04/2011 17:10 - United States

Today, I was running a marathon. I stopped to massage my stiff legs, when an elderly spectator taunted, "Oohhh yeah, that's it! Massage those legs good, boy!" She looked about 70. FML

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Carnival of Disasters
Dive into carnival, where hilarious costumes meet unexpected mishaps. Laughter is guaranteed, mask or no mask! …

Anonymous - 31/10/2010 15:34 - United States

Today, I was running a marathon for my school. Two hot girls started talking to me, so I glanced at them, and smiled. I turned back, just in time to knee a little boy in the face. FML

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The shape of you

KLO65 - 17/08/2025 09:00 - United States - Burlington

Today, I told my gym trainer I’d do anything to get in shape. He challenged me to run a mile without stopping. I agreed, then got winded halfway through and dramatically collapsed on the track. A 70 year-oldish woman jogged past me and said, “You’ll live.” FML

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crazycatlady1890 - 02/05/2019 18:00 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I finished a full marathon and just wanted to relax and get pampered by my husband afterwards. Instead, I spent the evening taking care of him and his back because he had a spasm. Don't worry, he feels much better now. Meanwhile, I can’t move my legs. FML

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Anonymous - 05/01/2010 20:16 - United States

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

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Jake - 29/04/2009 08:06 - Australia

Today, as I was taking an evening jog around my neighbourhood, I passed an elderly woman. I grinned at her as sign of friendliness to a common pedestrian. She grinned back. Whilst staring at my crotch. FML

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Volunteering gone too far

Tattooed and Sexy - 18/06/2023 22:00

Today, I volunteered at a 50 km trail race for charity and was at the service of a walker. It was fun until after the walk was completed, when he made me take off his boots and socks, and massage his big, super stinky, sweaty bare feet. His putrid feet were inches from my face the entire time. FML

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Gotta start somewhere

Anonymous - 15/01/2025 00:00 - United States - Gary

Today, I went outside to start jogging for improving my ever declining fitness. A kind stranger yelled, “You’re doing great!” as I was wheezing after my first block. I was sitting on a bench. FML

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Anonymous - 04/08/2019 00:01

Today, as I was jogging on the boardwalk, an old guy tripped me with his cane. As I was getting back up, I heard him say to his wife, "I wanted to see if she would actually fall." FML

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luvs2spooge89 - 01/05/2013 14:27 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I went on a run. Going a decent pace, I passed a woman walking her dog. I joked, "C'mon! Keep up!" Thirty feet later I stepped in mud, rolled my ankle and fell. The woman walked by as I lay in agony, and told me to keep up. FML

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FatRunner - 05/11/2009 07:41 - New Zealand

Today, while going for my daily run, a woman stopped me and said, "I think it's so great that people of your size are comfortable enough to run and show their bodies in public." FML

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truehitman2010 0

Monday 25 April 2011 23:09

we need a Wtf? button

oliveindamiddle 0

Monday 25 April 2011 23:08

I don't think this is a fyl or a ydi... it's just one of those moments in life where you're like.. WTF. :)

jamjelly386 5

Monday 25 April 2011 23:50

older women...awwwwww yyyyyyeeeaaaaahhhhh

Calyx_fml 21

Monday 25 April 2011 23:51

Did you get her number?

perdix 29

Monday 25 April 2011 23:53

Did she make your third leg stiffen up, too? She'd probably have enjoyed watching you massage that one, especially so!

whosechairisthat 0

Monday 25 April 2011 23:55

luckyyyyy! : >

whosechairisthat 0

Monday 25 April 2011 23:57

haha. i thumbed up this. i also thumbed up my own comment, so fml too

playboyintown 4

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:00

i would have kissed her and ran away !

richiewilson159 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:07

haha she likes you 

Norbury 6

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:08

YDI for flaunting at the grannies.

kronosa 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:11

STFU you liked it and you know it!

Jrefinne 7

Tuesday 26 April 2011 0:16

I know, I would've said the same thing!

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I had to deal with my baby daddy, who I currently live with and was in a relationship with (but not anymore after today) cursed me out after someone who works for the county came to our home and served him papers. Mind you he’s been speaking on the phone with this person, and told them he would be home. FML

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Today, I had drinks at a friend's house before going out to a concert. I still had a bottle of beer left, so I brought it along with me. I got kicked out five minutes into the show for bringing my own drink, which is apparently against the rules. I paid $75 to get kicked out over a $3 drink. FML

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Today, I was in the shower 'grooming' myself for my second anniversary with my boyfriend. Halfway through the hot water ran out. I now have the choice of going with the low 'half-fro' or risking hypothermia. My boyfriend thinks hypothermia would be the better option. FML

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Today, my budgie learned to fly, having finally outgrown his clipped wings. He flew straight over the gate, out the door and into my dogs jaws. FML

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Today, my sister made a comment about my small boobs. I told her I'm actually a C cup, and she told me she "can't even C them". I just got roasted with a fucking pun. FML

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Today, I found out that someone left an open sharpie pen in the dryer. It left pen marks on everything inside of the dryer. Not just one or two pen marks, but nearly 1,000 on each article of clothing. FML

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